


Dreaming of Mischief

by Arcadias_Fire



Series: Seeking Mischief [2]
Category: British Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Did I say "light angst"?, I never promised you a happy ending, Light Angst, Loki (Marvel) Gets a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Magic, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Romance, Slow Burn, The Tesseract (Marvel)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-09
Updated: 2018-04-22
Packaged: 2019-03-15 22:05:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 39,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13622460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arcadias_Fire/pseuds/Arcadias_Fire
Summary: “Help me, please.”Loki? What’s wrong?“Falling. Always falling.” His voice is broken with tears.I have you.The mist wraps around him, cradling him him in strong arms. It coalesces against his back, legs; the thin masculine form embraces him.You’re safe. You’re not falling anymore.***Tom thought he might be going mad. Ben was suspicious. Chris was getting curious. Tom felt like everyone knew something was wrong with him. And there might be. He had spoken to a god. He had spoken to his god. In his head. In a day full of insane blackouts, which Ben didn’t remember. Tom had spoken with Loki.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a direct sequel to Strange Mischief and won't make nearly as much sense without having read it first, so please take the time to go and read it if you're intrigued.

 

 

 

Tom was a terrible liar. Ironic for an actor. He could become another being - something beyond humanity, yet terribly, deeply, vulnerably, emotionally human - but he couldn’t lie to his friends. Especially to his best friends. Not convincingly.

Ben knew he was hiding something. Tom was sure of it. Of course if what Loki had told him was true, Ben was hiding some pretty important things himself. That was beside the point. Tom was fidgety, which resulted in him picking at his clothes, rubbing at his neck and collarbone, and otherwise “looking like he was molesting himself” according to _everyone_.

He had spoken to a god. He had spoken to _his_ god. In his head. In a day full of insane blackouts, which _Ben_ didn’t remember. Tom had spoken with Loki.

Maybe be he really was mad. It worried him. Everyone remembered what happened to Heath Ledger. Yes, that had been far more complicated that just being “too method” - though people may have missed the warning signs of mental illness because of it - but blurred lines between character and actor were something to be worried about.  It’s not like he had a Bifrost to leap off of, or a _real_ Mad Titan to taunt, but still…

Ben was suspicious. Chris was getting curious. Tom felt like everyone knew something was wrong with him. And there might be.

He also worried about Loki. If the encounter had been real the god had been unhappy when they’d spoken. Not that the god being less than content was a surprise, but Tom had encouraged him to try and make amends with Thor, and goodness knew if _that_ was a good idea or not.

If it had been real.

The blackouts, the “hallucinations”. Ben didn’t remember. So maybe he was mad.

On the other hand, maybe something magical had really happened to him, to _them_ , but only he remembered.

Which was more likely? 

_Oh god._

He was an intelligent person, logical, well educated. He should be able to accept the rational explanation, that it had all been an hallucination. But every fiber of his being screamed that it was real.

Fretting didn’t help though. He knew that part of the reason his mates worried was that he’d abandoned his normal physical routine for over a week. He should go for a run. It’d clear his head. Hopefully.

So put on his running gear and headed out. If nothing else, it felt good to be moving again. The burn of muscle and feel of the air in his lungs, against his skin freed his mind. He focused on putting one foot in front of the other, ignoring the looks he got - that he always got these days - the people around him. Everything but the music in his ears and the movement of his body.

Back at home, he felt more at ease, but still conflicted about his sanity. He stretched his muscles and ran through his regular yoga routine.

More stillness in his head. The uncertainty remained.

Tom folded into a lotus position on the floor and let the quiet of his flat surround him; let everything to fall away.

 

See the emotion. Acknowledge it. File it away. He notes the ticking of the clock. An abstract measurement of time, arbitrary, useful, but not relevant. The scent of his books. Old paper, dust, aged ink. Those smells are nostalgic, invoking the pleasure of reading, knowledge, escape, relaxation. He takes the scent into himself and files it away. The mat below him, the feel of his clothes, drying sweat on his skin, the almost invisible feel of his spectacles; accept, file away. Now, his breath. Breath is the key. It’s automatic, even this deep yogic breathing, but he focuses on it. From the root of his being to the crown of his head, lungs filling, expelling, muscles doing their work, trained, reflexive.

Breath. Stillness.

Nothing.

He doesn’t know how much time has passed, but his awareness starts to return. Rather than pulling himself out and up and into reality again, he turns inward. This isn’t something he’s been trained to do. It’s not part of the yogic tradition, but he feels like it should be possible. Other meditative practices do this, examine the mind.

He remembers where he met Loki. It was a wooden stage. Not a specific one, just an amalgamation of the many stages he’s performed on. He pictures this, and it’s there. He’s standing on the edge of the stage, looking out into darkness rather than the seating of the house. A spotlight shines down on him and provides the only light. The boards creak under his feet as he walks along the edge. He envisions Loki as he usually thinks of the character - looking like himself - dressed in the costume from the beginning of Ragnarok. An image appears. Green wrap-around tunic, black trousers, long green and black coat, his face, complete with makeup, wig, everything. He stands there in front of Tom looking annoyed, but doesn’t move.

But that’s not what the god had looked like.

Why not?

It’s like looking at a photograph. There’s no life to the image, but it’s more than that. This is him _performing_ Loki, not the god himself, and somehow it’s different.

He smiles. His imagination cannot compete with reality.

The actor sits on the edge of the stage and stares off into the blackness. The image behind him fades now that his attention is no longer on it. Elbows on his knees, fingers steepled in front of his face, forefingers resting against his lips while the rest are interlaced, thumbs under his chin. If the god had left something behind, how would he even recognize it? It’s not like he had any kind of special skills in this area. If anything, his acting skills might work against him.

On the other hand, if he’d learned anything from trying out for gigs, the first thing to do was make sure you aren’t giving up before you even start.

Tom cups his hands around his mouth and projects his voice into the darkness beyond the stage. “Loki! Loki where are you?”

There’s a faint glimmer of green in the distant blackness. So far out and down. The actor shouts again. The shimmer returns

_I need to get to that green._

Tom dives off the edge of the stage. Into the darkness.


	2. Chapter 2

He is falling. The Void reaches out with icy claws, slashing his clothing, searing his flesh. He falls forever, for there is no time here. The sensation of falling is an illusion, but is horribly real; it strikes the fault lines of his mind with hammers made of agony.

Shrieking nothing assaults his ears. Silence. The scent of blood and burning fills his nose as the Void destroys him. Molten metal floods his mouth, bleeds through his lips. Falling forever, falling into his nightmares made flesh.

Abandoned, hated, worthless, _monster_.

All that he’d reclaimed, worked so hard to build again is stripped by the Void. The battlements of his mind are sapped from below, ripped away by his own self doubt made manifest. Tossed aside, unworthy, nothing but a meaningless shadow of a god.

_Loki! Loki where are you?_

The god uncurles himself, wild eyes searching the darkness. No one has ever reached out to him here. In the hundreds of times he has relived this fall, there has never been a voice. Only his own mute screams.

_Loki!_

The voice is familiar, but caught in the horror of his fall, the god cannot place it. He has enough control to twist and turn, struggling against the fall, against the dream of the Void consuming him, breaking his sanity. He reaches out for the voice with his mind; hands cannot help him here. He catches a faint whisper of another consciousness, weaker than his own, but full of concern, compassion. He reaches for it, but his fingers slip through it like fog. He has no power in this place. He is at the mercy of the Void. It will not kill him, but he will wish for death.

“Help me, please.”

_Loki? What’s wrong?_

“Falling. Always falling.” His voice is broken with tears.

_I have you._ The mist wraps around him, cradling him him in strong arms. It coalesces against his back, legs; the thin masculine form embraces him. _You’re safe. You’re not falling anymore._

“Always,” the god whispers.

_No. That was a long time ago. You’re not falling now._ A wispy hand strokes his hair. _You’re safe now._

The Void vanishes.

 

o0o

 

Loki lay curled up on his bed. Not the horrible narrow thing on the ship, but the one that burned on Asgard. The form was still behind him, wrapped around chest and back, but it… _he_ was still transparent, indistinct. Loki drew on his seidr and poured magic into the form, strengthening it.

The arm that held him was pale - though darker than his own skin - and bare. Loki shifted to roll onto his back, and the other moved away to allow ease of movement, but kept a hand on his arm. Familiar blue eyes greeted him in a mirror of his face.

Loki raised his eyebrows. “Tom?”

“Hello.” The actor smiled.

“How… how did you get here?”

The human looked at him steadily. “Given that I don’t know where I am, I’m not sure. But I think I followed the line you left in my mind.”

“We are in _my_ mind.” The god’s eyebrows descend into a frown. “You should not have been able to do that.”

Tom shrugged. “I don’t have another explanation. Unless you called me here.”

“Even if I had wished to, I could not have. I have no power in the Void.”

“Why not?"

Loki looked at the ceiling. “It is the nature of the dream. I am powerless, helpless, doomed.”

Tom saw wetness gathering in the god’s eyes. “It’s alright. It’s just a dream.” He squeezed Loki’s arm. “You’re fine now.”

“I wish that were the case.” Loki sighed. “Each dream cracks my mind a little more.” He looked at the mortal. “You have my thanks.”

“When I saw that you were hurting, I couldn’t…” Tom swallowed around the lump in his throat. “I couldn’t just leave you there.”

“There are many who would.”

Loki’s despondency cut the mortal’s heart. He wrapped his arm around the god’s chest again. “I’m sorry.”

Loki shook his head. “I had overcome these dreams. I hate that they have returned.”

“What happened?”

“Strange happened. He made me _fall,_ ” Loki snarled. “It merely angered me at the time, but after. The dreams began again.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t kill him.”

The god laughed. “I tried. That is how I came to your realm.”

“The ‘accident’?”

“Two infinity stones together are very powerful and when brought together unexpectedly, unpredictable. I do not regret it though.”

“Oh?”

“No. I am happy to have met you and our other selves. I learned much.”

“Ah. Good.”

Loki sensed something off about that reply. “Have you had any trouble?”

“Me? Other than thinking that I’d gone mad for the last week or so, no.”

Loki laughed. “And now? Do you still think yourself mad?”

“Maybe. Although I think that if I’d had a… a psychotic break I would think that I _was_ you, not,” he looked around, “in your bedroom.”

“Your friend might disagree.” Loki grinned wickedly. “Or at least he’d be fine with both.”

“I think I prefer the bedroom.”

The god raised an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

“Not that there’s anything wrong with being you,” the actor continued. He hoped he hadn’t offended the mischief maker. “But I prefer you being you and me being me"

“I can agree with that. Though I have yet to see you being me.”

“This is getting confusing.”

“Is it?” Loki rolled onto his side to face the mortal, bringing them nearly face to face. “Do you feel yourself a part of me, Tom?” He wondered if the actor would pull away from the intimacy of their positions. He didn’t.

“I do.” Blue eyes met pale green. “Perhaps we’re a part of each other.”

“I believe we must be. I would not usually allow someone so close.” The god reached up to thread his fingers through Tom’s dark blond curls. He found the differences in their hair fascinating. “But we are distinct.”

“I still can’t quite believe you’re real.” The actor allowed his hand to finally reach up for Loki’s inky locks. They flowed past his fingers like silk, much finer than any of the wigs he’d worn to portray the god.

The wicked smile was back on Loki’s face. “Is there anything I can do to convince you?”

“I don’t know. Anything you do could be all in my head.”

“All in _my_ head, I think you will find.” The trickster continued to run his fingers through the mortal’s hair. “What do you imagine we could do?” His voice came out a purr.

The actor’s eyes widened. “It’s your mind.”

Loki was stung by the fear he saw in the mortal’s eyes. “I should never do anything to harm you if I can help it.”

Tom frowned. “That’s not what I… Why?”

“I told you, I appreciate what you have done for me on your Midgard. You also saved me from the Void. Even if it were not for those things, we are connected.”

“You see yourself in me.”

“Some, but you are not a reflection like some of the others.”

At the mention of ‘others’, Tom frowned. “You talked about traveling to other places earlier. Where did you go?”

“I do not know where I was, or even who I was much of the time. The only continuity was my face. _Our_ face.”

“That sounds amazing. You saw worlds that I’ve only imagined; talked to the actual characters.”

Loki grinned at the actor’s enthusiasm. “I only spoke with two of my hosts.”

“Who?”  

“A soldier whose name I never learned and Thomas Sharpe.”

Tom winced. “Why did you talk to _him_?”

“I was in his mindscape, much like you are now in mine. I found him quite interesting. We had much in common.”

“That makes far too much sense.”

Loki laughed quietly.

“How are things with Thor?”

Loki considered a flippant answer, but decided the mortal deserved better. “We are better. Brothers again.”

“And?”

“And that is all.”

“I’m sorry.” Tom began stroking the god’s hair again.

“I knew that he would not wish to go back to what we had been. He has responsibilities, even if he would knowingly take a Frost Giant into his bed. Which he would not.”

Tom frowned. “Wouldn’t it be better now that he knows you’re not blood brothers?”

“My dear mortal,” the god laughed, “that was half the fun. Sneaking around, terrified that we would be caught. The scandal it would have created at court! Odin would have been mortified.” Loki grinned at the memory.

“And your mother?”

The smile faded. “I think she would have understood, but I did wish to avoid her disappointment.”

“So…”

“So? If you have questions, I will try and answer them.”

“Do you prefer men?”

“Or just brothers?” Loki smiled as his eyes flowed over the human. “I appreciate beauty in all forms.”

Tom nodded.

“And you?”

“I…” Tom was surprised to have been asked. “Similar, I suppose, but women are safer.”

“A woman can kill you as easily as a man, and it is more likely she will do so when you bed her.”

“That’s not what I meant.” The actor frowned. “My earth is still dealing with homosexuality - and bisexuality - and it isn’t totally accepted.”

“I did get that impression while I was there. Midgard is very backwards in regards to matters of sex and the heart.”

“Well, as someone who’s seen as a - pardon the hubris - sex symbol, it’s safer and better for my career to be seen to be only involved with women.”

“That is quite ridiculous.”

Tom sighed. “I know.”

“Perhaps I should conquer your Midgard so as to change things.”

The actor looked at the god in muted horror before he saw the grin on Loki’s face. “You’re joking.”

“Of course I am. I would not put you at risk.”

“Please tell me that’s not the only reason.” The hand in Loki’s hair stopped moving.

“Ruling is too much work and is quite dull. Besides, an army of… what are they called, ‘fangirls’? Not the most effective tool.”

“You know about Loki’s Army?” Tom laughed and started petting the god’s hair again.

“I avoided the most sanity provoking aspects of your internet, but I did learn a few things.”

“Should I clear my browser history?”

The god thought for a moment to parse what Tom had said, then laughed. “My first experience with Midgardian computers was through Hawkeye. I assure you I left no traces on your machine.”

“That’s so odd.”

“Odd?”

“Your reality is my job. It’s weird.”

Loki lifted a shoulder. “It is part of how we are connected.”

“Is that why this is so comfortable?”

“You are comfortable here with me?”

Tom nodded and wrapped a lock of Loki’s hair around his finger. “I feel like I’ve known you for years. Well I have, really.”

“No, you have not.”

The actor frowned. “Then you explain it.”

“We are the same.”

“We’re really not.”

The god laughed, then sobered. “You truly do not fear me?”

“I know you’re dangerous, but if you say you won’t hurt me, I believe you.”

Loki smiled. Just smiled. He didn’t realize it, but it was Tom’s smile, warm and happy. The actor saw it and recognized the look for what it was. It shook him more than anything else he’d experienced with the god. “What did I say?”

“The perfect words.”

Tom raised an eyebrow.

Loki shook his head, unable to explain. He ran his fingers through the actor’s hair again, enjoying the feeling of how the blond curls wrap around his fingers.

Tom yawned and his eyes fluttered shut, suddenly exhausted.

“You should return to your body.” Loki’s tone was sharp, but sleepy blue eyes just blinked at him. “You must not fall asleep here. It would be dangerous.”

“Don’t want to go.”

The god smiled and cupped Tom’s jaw with a cool hand. “I will visit you.”

“Promise?”

“I do. Inside of you is a line that leads back to your body. Pull on that line as you would a rope and it will restore you to your home.”

Tom closed his eyes and looked for the line Loki described. After a moment, he found it. It was a pale aquamarine, and growing dim.

“Good. I will see you soon. Now pull.”

The mortal did as the god commanded, and felt himself yanked away.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Consequences? What?

 

 

Tom opened his eyes and saw the ceiling of his sitting room. He felt weak, ravenous, and ready to sleep for a week. His body screamed at him as he tried to pull himself upright. A glance at the clock on the wall told him he’d been out for about three hours. It felt like he’d spent the night on the floor.

With a groan, he dragged himself to his feet and headed to the kitchen. He gulped a glass of water down as the kettle heated more water for tea. He looked in the fridge while the tea steeped. There were a few scraps; enough to fill his stomach. He sat on the couch, mug cradled in his hands, eyes fixed blankly on the bookshelf across the way.

Music invaded his thoughts. The phone rang in his ear, and he automatically picked it up.

“Tom? Where the fuck have you been?” Ben’s voice was tight with anger and worry.

“I was meditating. Why?”

“I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”

Tom looked at his mobile; the date confirmed it. “What the hell?”

“What is going on with you?” Worry had taken over anger.  

“Nothing, I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Darling, I promise you I’m fine. I just… lost track of time.”

“For over 36 hours?” Ben sighed. “I’m coming over.”

“Whatever you want. I’ll be here.”

Ben hung up without saying goodbye.

Now that he looked at the phone, Tom saw he had a dozen missed calls and four times as many texts. Most were from Ben and Luke. A couple from Chris. One from Emma. He quickly texted his publicist, sister, and the Australian actor back to let them know he was fine, then curled up on the sofa and closed his eyes.

Ben’s ringtone directly below his ear woke him up. He stumbled to the door. To his surprise, the other man pulled him into a fierce hug as soon as the door opened. Gray eyes looked him over with concern.

“You look like shit.”

“I love you too, darling.” Sarcasm dripped from Tom’s voice. “Come in.” He went back to the sofa and collapsed.

Ben hung up his coat then joined him. “You really do look terrible.”

Tom ran his hands over his face. “I haven’t looked in the mirror, so I’ll take your word for it. I guess I must have been ill.”

Ben placed the back of his hand on Tom’s forehead and frowned. “You’re cold.”

He shrugged. “I don’t feel cold, just tired.”

“Anything else?”

“I ache a bit.”

Ben got up and headed for the kitchen, and returned with a glass of water and painkillers. Tom took the medicine and drank the water, obedient under Ben’s glare. He nodded and took the glass back to the kitchen before returning to the sofa.

“Now are you going to tell me what’s been going on?" 

Tom shifted on the couch, looking away. “What do you mean?”

“You’ve been behaving oddly for over a week, and now this?” Ben shook his head and placed a hand on the other man’s shoulder. “Please just tell me what’s wrong.”

“Nothing’s wrong, I’ve just been ill.” Tom rubbed his eyes. “I appreciate your concern, but I just need to rest, alright?”

“Fine.” It clearly wasn’t fine. “You’re giving me a key.”

Tom raised an eyebrow at Ben, who blushed and looked down. “I need to know if you’re here passed out on the floor or dead, or…” He looked back up. “Please?”

“Fine.” Tom couldn’t resist big gray puppy eyes. “I think I have a spare.”

He had to rummage in a bureau in his bedroom for a minute to find the key, but he found it.

“Here.” He pressed the key into Ben’s hand. “Now go home to your wife and let me sleep. Baby her instead of me.”

Ben winced. “Sophie’s abroad, but I can take a hint.” He turned to get his coat.

“I do appreciate you checking up on me.”

“Of course. Now go rest.”

Tom nodded and headed back to his bedroom.

 

Ben locked the door behind him and pulled out his mobile as he walked away from the flat. “Chris? Sorry I know it’s late there. Okay, not that late. Have you heard from Tom recently? Yeah, he’s acting really odd. He won’t tell me what’s going on. Can you talk to him? Not now, he’s probably asleep.” He looked at his watch. “Half one. Yes. He said he was ill. I don’t know.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I really don’t. We both got food poisoning a week or so ago, I suppose it could be that, but it didn’t seem to hit him as hard at the time. Bad calamari. Anyway, you’ll call him? Thanks. Let me know if you hear anything.”

He slipped the mobile back into his pocket and walked home in silence.


	4. Chapter 4

 

 

Doing magical research on a refugee ship was more difficult than Loki had originally thought. Not that he thought it would be easy, but his beloved library had burned and the librarians fleeing Hela’s rampage only managed to save a handful of text, none of them helpful. He was by far the best seidr user on the ship - left of all Asgard - given that only his mother and Odin had come even close. The ship housed a handful of healers, but those women were adept at _their_ field, not the more advanced topics of space and time manipulation.

That left him with the Tesseract and experimentation. Taking himself to another realm using the azure cube was child’s play; he could return to Midgard in seconds. Using it to travel to another universe, a tangent off of Ysdriggle, that was another thing altogether. However, given that the Tesseract transcended dimension as he understood it, it should be possible.

“Brother, what are you doing?”

Loki looked up at Thor from the handful of parts he’d scavenged from around the ship. “Building a device.”

The king - for that is what he was, now - squatted down beside him. “Aye, I can see that. But what is it?”

“Dearest brother, do you think you would understand even if I explained it to you?” Loki smiled. “It is advanced enough magic that I’m not sure even Mother would have understood what I’m doing.”

Thor scowled. “Could you not try?”

“It is intended to direct power into a realm beyond the Void.” This wasn’t exactly true, but Loki had no intention of revealing what he was actually doing to his brother.

“And this is useful how?”

Loki rolled his eyes. “It can be used to shunt power away from where we are?”

“So it would be a kind of shield?”

“It could be used that way, yes.” The dark god sighed and looked down at the half built device. “Mostly I am using this to keep myself occupied.”

Thor lay a comforting hand on his brother’s neck. “I understand. We have lost much.”

Loki nodded, glad that he was still able to fool his brother at least sometimes. He looked up through his lashes. “I do not wish to be in the way, so I fill my idle hands.”

The blond smiled. “Very well brother, I shall leave you to your tinkering.” Thor stood and left the room.

Going back to the device, Loki shook his head. Thor was clearly just happy that he wasn’t causing mischief on the ship, which is what he would normally do when bored. So his brother would leave him alone for a while. Hopefully long enough for him to complete the project and get away.

 

o0o

 

The device was nearly complete, but it needed an anchor point. Back in his room, Loki installed the Tesseract into the framework he’d built and lay on his narrow bed. The cube sang to him.

_let’s go let’s go let’s go_

“Yes, yes, I hear you. Soon.”

He placed his long fingers into the slots provided. He felt a tug on his consciousness, and he let it happen as the stone pulled him out of his body, and far, far away.


	5. Chapter 5

The room is lit in cool darkness. Rich red velvet curtains surround a heavy medieval bed. Thick wooden posts, black with age, support a scarlet canopy. A narrow crack in the drapes betray movement beyond, but nothing more.

He’s certain he shouldn’t be here, knows that this is _wrong_. But he approaches the large bed, his feet moving without his volition. He doesn’t want to see what’s there, past the curtains. He is compelled. A man’s voice, moaning in pleasure, draws him in even as he wants to walk away.

Unbidden, his hand draws back the crimson drape.

Pale flesh against dark silk sheets twisting in ecstasy. He doesn’t want to know, but he _has_ to see who the pale muscular chest belongs to. Lust darkened eyes that flicker between green and blue stare back at him. Long black hair lays across the pillow.

A wicked grin greets his gasp. 

“Won’t you join us?” Loki reaches out.

“Us?” The god’s back arches in pleasure, and Tom’s eyes are drawn down his torso. Pale gray eyes, wide with desire meet his. “Ben?”

“I told you he wanted this. That he would kneel for you.” Loki’s long hand pushes Tom’s best mate back to his work and gasps. His hands knot in the other man’s hair. “You can have this too.”

“Loki, what... what is this?”

“Is it not obvious? Idiot mortal. So foolish. If you’re unwilling to join, leave me in peace.” The god moans, his attention now elsewhere.

Tom finally regains control of his legs and runs. The god’s cries of pleasure chase him through hallways clothed in green silk. This place is a nightmare maze. The sounds follow him. He can’t escape what he just saw. He covers his ears as he runs. He doesn’t want to hear, but the music of ecstasy is in his head, not the air around him. The reality of the sounds hound his footsteps.

After he runs for what seems like hours, he arrives back to the bedroom. His feet try to bring him back inside. _You can have this too_. But it’s wrong. All wrong. He convinces his body to move, to run away, but before he can take more than a half a dozen steps away, his body betrays him again. He stumbles and sprawls onto the floor.

Black boots walk into his field of vision and a pale hand reaches down to him. He looks up. Loki stands over him, taller than life, clothed in green and black. No longer nude and writhing. Tom can still hear the pair on the bed, his own voice rising in pleasure.

“Do you need assistance?” The god of mischief looks down at Tom with a crooked grin. Another euphoric cry from the other room catches his attention, and he looks past Tom down the hall. “Someone seems to be enjoying themselves.”

Tom pushes himself up to his knees. “Loki?”

“Yes?” The god looks back down.

“What’s going on?”

“I would guess I interrupted a rather interesting dream.” He holds his hand out again. “Come.”

Tom takes his hand and is pulled smoothly to his feet. “You’re real? Then who?” He looks over his shoulder. The bedroom has vanished.

“Oh, were you dreaming of me?” The god’s smile is wider now.

The human shakes his head. “You weren’t… I wasn’t… he…” He covers his face with his hands.

“You are distressed.” Loki wraps his arms loosely around the actor’s shoulders. “My apologies. I only heard sounds of pleasure and assumed it was a good dream. I should have known better.”

Tom looks up at the god’s bitter tone. “It wasn’t like that. It wasn’t _me_ with you. Or properly you.”

Loki raises an eyebrow, but let’s it go. He sees the hurt and confusion on his doppleganger’s face. “It was just a dream. Your mind is being stretched in new ways. Some anxiety is normal.” He slides his hands down to Tom’s arms. “I can help.”

Tom nods and leans forward, resting his head on the god’s shoulder. “Please. I don’t know what to do. Everything is so confusing.”

Surprised by the mortal’s obvious reliance on him, Loki puts a comforting hand on Tom’s neck, echoing the gesture he and Thor sometimes share with one another. “I want to take you away from here.” His words are soft in the actor’s ear.

“Away?” Tom looks up. “What do you mean?”

“I have found a way to reproduce the accident. I can take you to another world.” The god is grinning. “You can see our other selves. With me.”

“I can?” Blue eyes widen, and the sun comes out in the actor’s smile. “We can? Can we go now?”

Loki laughs in delight. “Not today, but soon. I will come to you again, but physically this time. We can travel from your realm.”

“You’re coming to Earth? I can see you in person, not just in my head?”

Loki nods. “I will use the Tesseract to come to you, and we can explore together, yes?”

“The Tesseract? You’re bringing it with you?”

The god nods. “I will need to since I am coming bodily.”

Tom frowns, then nods, smiling. “Yes. Yes we’ll go.” He pulls the god into a hug. “We can travel, see everything. Take our time.”

Loki frowns, though the other man can’t see it. There’s something odd about the way the human is reacting to all of this, but he can’t put his finger on it. “For as long as you wish.” He buries his hand in Tom’s hair. “Is there something wrong?”

“I…” The mortal hesitates. “My friends were - are - worried about me. I was unconscious for almost two days after I saw you last.”

“Two days? I saw you yesterday.” Loki pulls away slightly so he can see Tom’s face.

“It’s been four.”

“Four days? Time must flow differently in your realm than in mine. That is useful information. I may need to change the enchantment slightly.” The god frowns, lost in thought.

Tom squeezes the god to gain his attention. “Loki, it’s fine, I don’t mind. Just come back to me. As soon as you can.”

The dark god searches the face of his double. “I will, I promise.” The resulting smile takes his breath away. He runs a hand down the human’s face, thumb brushing his cheekbone. He wants to kiss the mortal, but if Tom rejects the advance, it will ruin everything. He wants to trust this beautiful man. He knows better. No one can be trusted, no matter how appealing. “I will let you rest.” He sends out a small pulse of seidr and a green light floods through Tom’s mind. “You should have more control over your dreams now.”

“Thank you.”

They embrace again. Neither wants to let go, but both are afraid of what the other will think if they continue to cling on.

“I had best go if I am to finish with the Tesseract. I will see you as soon as I am able.” Loki pulls away, hands trailing over Tom’s arms.

“Yes.”

Their hands meet, fingers entwine, then slide apart.

Loki smiles. “Soon.” He pulls himself away from the other man, then from his mind entirely. Before he can do something he’ll regret.


	6. Chapter 6

 

The morning after Tom dreamed of Loki - and Ben - he couldn’t look at his friend without blushing. Ben had been keeping an eye on him, coming over to his flat every day since Tom “vanished”. If Ben noticed that Tom’s gaze wandered whenever they almost made eye contact, he didn’t say anything.

“You’re lucky you aren’t working on anything at the moment, otherwise Luke would have broken in.”

Tom shrugged. “I guess it’s best to be ill when you’re not working.” He ignored Ben’s scowl. “Just so you know, I’ll be going away for a few days some time soon.”

“When?”

“I’m not sure.”

Ben gave him a stern look. “Where are you going?”

“Traveling. To the continent, I expect. With a friend.”

Ben scowled again. “You’ll text me at least?”

“Yes. I’ll text when I leave.”

“I don’t want to have to use the key you gave me.”

Tom raised an eyebrow. “I’m sure you don’t.”

Ben made an exasperated noise. “Tom…”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I worried you.” He rubbed his face to avoided looking at his friend in the eye. “You really don’t need to concern yourself with me.”

“I’m worried. I’m going to worry. This just isn’t like you.”

Tom ground his teeth in frustration. “For fuck’s sake, I was ill. Just…” _Just leave me alone or stop lying to me._ “Why do care so much?”

Ben’s mouth dropped open. “You’re my mate. Mates look out for one another.”

Tom sprang to his feet, but resisted the urge to go shake his _friend_ until his teeth rattled. Instead he walked to the window and looked out. “I’ll let you know if I need looking after.”

Ben flinched. “I see.”

“I’m sorry darling, but there’s no need for any of this. I’m fine.”

Ben got to his feet. “I guess I’ll leave you alone then.”

Tom nodded and kept his gaze on the world outside his window. “I’ll let you know when I leave.”

“Okay.”

Tom closed his eyes against the pain in Ben’s voice. “I’m sorry."

“You’re always sorry.” Ben went to the door. “I’d best go before I say anything that makes things worse, shall I?”

“Fine.”

The door slammed shut.

Tom wasn’t particularly surprised when his phone rang a few minutes later.

 

“Hi Chris.”

“You alright, mate? Ben just called. He said you kicked him out of your house.”

“I didn’t kick him out. He was being a bellend, and I wasn’t taking it.”

Chris laughed, and it made Tom smile. “He gets that way.”

“Well I’m tired of it; he needs to lay off the mother hen routine.”

“You’re fine, then?”

“Yes, I’m fine. Just annoyed and tired. I needed this holiday more than I thought.” He considered telling Chris the same almost-lie he’d told Ben, but decided that he didn’t need to. The thought of telling him the truth didn’t even enter his mind. Chris only rang occasionally, usually when Ben talked him into it. Tom and Chris used to be so close, but living on the other side of the world made it hard. “Thanks for calling.”

“I’ll talk Ben off the ledge, no worries. You get some rest.”

“Thank you. Bye.”

“Later.”

Now that he was alone with his thoughts, Tom couldn’t help but wonder when Loki would be back. If the god were physically here, it would make everything so much easier. Better. For one thing, Tom would finally have proof that all the odd things that had happened weren’t all in his head.

 

o0o

 

Tom reclined on the sofa, tea in one hand, a script in the other. He set the mug down to scribble a note in the margin of the document. A moment later, his sitting room lit up with azure lightening and there was crack like a tree limb breaking. A blue window opened up in empty space for a few seconds and a dark figure tumbled out, the vortex snapping closed behind. Tom was glad the tea wasn’t in his hand as the pen and script fell from his numb fingers.

Loki lay sprawled on hands and knees on his hardwood floor, breathing heavily. Wisps of smoke drifted off his leather clad shoulders. The Tesseract sat before the god, encased in gold wires which twisted around pieces of crystal. It was beautiful.

Tom leapt to his feet and rushed to the god’s side.

“Are you alright?” He set a hand on Loki’s back, noting that he was wearing the dark blue armor from Ragnarok rather the green and black clothing Tom had always seen him before. “Loki?”

The god looked up, still panting. Dark circles hung under his eyes. “That was more difficult than I expected.” He caught the actor’s concerned expression. “I will be fine.” He put a hand on the Tesseract, and with a twist of his wrist, the cube vanished.

“Wow.” Tom sat on his heels beside the god. “You’re here.”

Loki nodded and sat back, echoing the actor’s posture. “I said I would come, did I not?”

“You did. I just… I wasn’t sure any of this was real.”

Loki nodded. “I understand. I have doubted my own sanity often enough.”

“Let’s get you off the floor.” Tom stood and reached out. Loki grasped his wrist and their palms touched. Tom felt a jolt of frizzion when the god’s cool hand met his own. Given the expression on the other’s face, Loki felt it too. Tom tried to pull Loki to his feet, but he stumbled into Tom’s side. “Hey, steady there.” Tom lead him to the sofa. “Do you want some water?” he asked.

Loki nodded.

Tom returned a moment later and handed him a glass, which Loki drained in a single go. Tom handed the god a second glass and took the first back to the kitchen. When he returned with another full glass, he sat on the sofa and watched the other. “You sure you’re alright?”

“I will be.” Loki sipped at the third glass. “As I said, this required more of me than I thought. I will need to rest before we go anywhere.” He looked up at the actor and smiled. “Do not be overly concerned. You will see the universe soon enough.”

“I’m more worried about you.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “I am a god. I will recover.”

“Yes. Sorry.” Tom looked down. “You just look like you’ve been through a lot.”

“I have had easier journeys, but harder ones as well.” Loki patted Tom’s arm. “It was nothing like falling through the Void.”

“Good.” Hesitantly,  Tom touched the back of the god’s hand. The contact sent another small shock through his arm. “What _is_ that?”

“I am not certain.” Loki pressed his palm against Tom’s. There was a tiny current of seidr flowing between them. He moved their hands so that they lined up, and brought them up to eye-height. “Magic, it seems. I expect it has something to do with our bond.”

Tom noticed that their fingers were exactly the same length, the hands mirror images of one another. He could feel his palm heating the god’s slightly cooler skin. “Bond?”

“That we are parallel to one another.”

Tom looked from their hands to the god’s face. “It’s not because of the links you set up in our heads?”

A quirk of a smile graced Loki’s lips. “That may also be a factor.”

“I’ve never felt anything like it.” The mortal interlaced his fingers with the god’s. “It’s amazing.”

“I’m slightly surprised you can feel it at all. May I try something?” At Tom’s nod, Loki pushed a small pulse of magic into his hand; enough to cast a tiny illusion, but no more. The magician watched for his double’s reaction; Tom gasped and his eyes went wide, pupils dilated. “I take it you feel that.”

The human swallowed hard and nodded. His eyes fluttered shut as Loki increased the flow of seidr to a steady trickle. His reply came out a breathy whisper. “I can definitely feel that.” He felt his cheeks flush. “You might want to stop.”

Loki smiled and replied in a purring voice. “Why would I do that?” Loki put another pulse through their hands. “You are so clearly enjoying it.”

Tom dropped his head back as the more powerful magic flowed through him. “God. That feels…” His grip on the god’s hand tightened.

The column of the mortals throat was begging for his mouth, but again Loki resisted the temptation to kiss the mortal. “What does it feel like?”

“Like my nerves are dancing. It’s incredible.”

“Such poetry.” The god smiled. “Do you still want me to stop?”

“Want isn’t the right word.” Tom rolled his head forward and opened his eyes. There was only a sliver of blue around the edges of his pupils. “I may need it though.”

Loki bit his lip. The beautiful mortal was even more gorgeous like this, but he let go of Tom’s hand. The connection between them broke with a painful snap, and both men shook their hands in an identical gesture.

“Something to explore more at a later date, perhaps?”

Tom nodded. He sat back and straightened his spine, eyes closed, breathing deeply.

“What are you doing?” Loki asked.

“Breathing.”

“I can see that.” Loki looked more closely. “There is seidr moving in your body.”

Tom opened an eye. “What?”

“The… magical power that I gave you. I can see it moving.” The god’s eyes widened. “You are controlling it as you breathe. It is cycling through you.” He sketched a slow figure eight with one hand. “That should not be possible.” Loki shook his head. “I’m too exhausted to deal with this.”

Tom relaxed his posture. “I’m sorry, you should rest. I have a spare room if you want to sleep.” He stood, offered a hand to the god, and helped pull him upright. This time they both ignored the tiny spark when their hands met. He showed Loki the small second bedroom. “Help yourself to food if I’m not around when you wake up.”

The god sat on the bed and began to remove his boots. “Thank you. Do not be concerned if I sleep for at least a day.” He reached for the fasteners of his armor, and started to peel the blue leather from his skin.

Tom tried to look away as the tunic came off, but kept watching. He felt himself blush. The god’s pale torso was more muscular than his own at the moment, but he was still very lean. “I’ll bring you some clothes too. Everything of mine should fit you.”

Loki chuckled. “It is... convenient.” He quirked a smile at the actor’s apparent bashfulness, which made Tom’s blush deepen.

“I’ll leave something out here in the hallway for you,” Tom said, halfway out the door. “Sleep well.” He escaped the rest of the way before the god could strip down more and closed the door behind him. Through the door, as he walked away, he could hear Loki’s laughter.

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

Loki did in fact sleep for over a day. After 24 hours passed, Tom peeked into the spare room to make sure he was okay. The god lay curled up on his side, the duvet wrapped around him like a cocoon, his hair a tousled mess on the pillow. Once Tom was sure that he was breathing evenly, he set the spare clothes he’d retrieved on the dresser and left Loki alone again.

The next morning when he got back from his run, Tom found Loki in the kitchen rummaging through the fridge. The god wore the black clothes that Tom had left him. The tee shirt looked tight across his shoulders and chest, but the trousers fit well. Very well.

“There is hot water if you wish to have tea.” Loki spoke with his head still in the refrigerator. “Have you eaten?”

“Not yet.” Tom made himself a cup of tea, reaching around Loki for the milk. Their arms brushed against each other Tom felt another jolt when they touched. “That’s really distracting.”

Loki chuckled. “I expect we shall get used to it.”

“I hope so.”

Neither brought up the option of avoiding physical contact.

Now that he saw the god more clearly, Tom noticed his hair was smoothed down with only a slight wave to it. Loki also had half an apple in his hand. “I can make us breakfast,” Tom offered.

Loki straightened. “That may be wise. I am unfamiliar with your cooking devices. I would request protein, however.”

“Apple not doing it for you?”

Loki took a bite and shrugged. Tom chuckled and started pulling ingredients out of the fridge.

“I would like to observe, if you do not mind.”

“Of course not.”

Lok sat down one of the barstools at the edge of the kitchen where he could see  the mortal work, but be out of the way. He found the stovetop a mystery, so he watched carefully as Tom adjusted the various dials. Cooking over flame was familiar, but this tightly controlled blue fire was new to him.

Tom felt the god’s gaze on him as he prepared breakfast, but did his best to ignore the cool gray-green eyes that watched him so closely. “I take it they don’t use gas cookers on Asgard?”

“I believe that the kitchens used wood for fire most of the time,” Loki replied. “Most of my own experience has been using a campfire.”

“I guess that makes sense.” He’d never really thought about Loki cooking for himself. “Did all the warriors learn cookery over a fire?”

The god chuckled. “They did, but most did not have the patience to do it well. There was some feeling that it was either the work of servants or womenfolk. A poor job of cooking meat was a sign of prowess.”

Tom shook his head. “I assume you have plenty of patience.”

“Of course. I would make a poor seidmadr without it.”

“So you got stuck cooking?”

“Thor prefers his meat cooked through, so yes.” He laughed. “At one point Fandral suggested to Sif that she should share the duty. She punched him.”

Tom laughed. “I can see her doing just that.”

Loki smiled. It was nice to not have to explain who he’d spent his youth with nor have invasive questions about them now. He had not especially cared for his childhood companions, but the Warriors Three had died with honor, if pointlessly. He spared a thought for Sif, wondering if she’d heard of Asgard’s destruction yet.

“Where did you send her?” Apparently the mortal’s mind was running along the same lines.

“To hunt for the other Infinity Stones. She was too curious. Too observant.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“I wish that I knew how much you have experience of my life.”

Tom stilled. His shoulders went ridgid, then relaxed. “There’s no way to know until we compare notes.” He glanced over his shoulder and smiled at the god. “Though it’s safe to say that anything concerning your love life hasn’t come up.”

“Nothing at all?” Loki sniggered and took a bite of his apple.

“There are tons of fan theories - including the correct one - but no, it’s not covered. Thor’s relationships, yes. Though obviously even that’s incomplete.”

“Poor mortal, no kisses for you.”

“I can do without that level of awkwardness, thanks.”

“Ah yes. Romance is very different when you are playing out a role not your own.”

Tom glanced over again. “Seduction?”

“When the scheme requires, yes.”

“Huh.” Tom turned back to the stove. “Having cameras there doesn’t help.”

“I would think not.”

“Not that really I mind it, but I’d rather have the real thing.”

The wistfulness in the actor’s voice made Loki take more interest. “I take you do not have a… ‘significant other’ at the moment? Is that the correct term?”

“It is.” Tom moved the food onto plates and brought them over to the bar where the god was sitting. He’d given Loki the lion’s share. “And no, I don’t. I have a hectic schedule. It makes things difficult.” He grabbed his tea and joined Loki. “I’m impressed you’ve learned so much about Midgardian culture.”

Loki shrugged. “It is easy enough.” He took a bite of the food on his plate, not knowing what to expect. “This is quite good.”

“Thank you.”

For a while the pair ate in silence.

Tom looked up from his finished plate. “When do you want to go?”

“I should be prepared by this afternoon.”

“Do you have any idea how long we’ll be gone?”

Loki let his shoulders rise and drop. “Strange and I traveled to several different realms in the span of an afternoon. I do not believe that either of us tarried in any one place since we were eager to return home, but it did not seem like too much time had passed.”

“Well, I have a cover story, so it doesn’t matter if we’re gone for a while.”

The god shook his head. “We must not stay too long. We’ll be leaving our bodies behind, so we must return to care for them if nothing else.”

“Leaving our bodies?”

“Yes. We’ll be travelling astrally, inhabiting different bodies when we arrive, as I did with you.”

Tom frowned. “But you were able to do that since we’re the same, right?”

“That has been my hypothesis.”

“But if there are two of us, won’t we end up in the same body?”

Loki raised his eyebrows. “That is an excellent point. We may.”

“That sounds… intimate.”

The god chuckled. “We have been in each other’s minds before.”

“Would we share senses and such?”

The god shrugged. “Having never done this, I don't know.” He frowned. “I may be able to create a double that I can use while you are in the main body.” He waved a hand and duplicate of himself appeared standing in the kitchen.

Tom looked from one Loki to the other with wide eyes. “I am so impressed right now.”

Both Lokis smirked.

“He’s not just an illusion?”

The Loki in the kitchen replied. “I am not.” He walked over to the breakfast bar where the other sat and brushed his fingertips over Tom’s hand. The human felt the contact, but there was no spark this time. “Interesting.”

“Very,” the sitting Loki agreed with the double. They reach out simultaneously and each take one of Tom’s hands.

Tom closed his eyes as a wave of magic flowed through him. He gasped. “Fuck.”

“Fascinating,” said the standing Loki.

Tom bit back a moan. “Could you please stop experimenting on me?”

“Apologies.” The hands retreated and Tom’s mind cleared.

“Fuck.”

“You said that already.”

“It’s worth repeating.” Tom opened his eyes again. Loki stood next to him and was singular again. “Did you move while my eyes were closed or did you transfer yourself to the other one?”

“The latter.”

“Fuck.”

Loki laughed. “You keep saying that.”

“It seems appropriate.”

The god raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

Tom ran his hands over his face. “So, we’re going this afternoon? Do you need to do anything or rest until then or what?”

“I will need to rest and we should both eat well. There are some preparations to be done, but they should not take long. Do you have something you need to do?”

“I have to text a couple of people, but that won’t take more than a minute.” Tom picked up the empty plates and took them back to the kitchen. “So what will we do until then?” He looked over his shoulder and saw the god shrug. “We could compare notes? Or you could tell me more about magic?”

Loki’s grin made Tom blush. “So you are interested in magic?”

He blushed harder. “Who wouldn’t be?”

“Many. And you did request that I stop.”

“It was overwhelming. I don’t object on principle.”

“As much as I would like to explore your reactions to my seidr, for the moment I must gather power, not expend it.” The wicked smile turned regretful.

Tom returned the smile with a concerned one of his own. “Is this going to be difficult for you?”

Loki was touched that his well being seemed to matter so much to the human. “It is more of an experiment than I would prefer, but it will be worth it.”

“Okay.”

The god raised an eyebrow. “Just like that?”

“What do you mean?”

“You do not have questions? No challenges?”

“You’re the expert, not me. All of my ‘magic’ comes from special effects.”

“You sell yourself short.” The god stood and walked into the kitchen. “You must have some kind of seidr for this to happen.” He grasped Tom’s hand. The spark made both of them start. “I would not be here if you weren’t…”

“Weren’t what?” Tom asked when Loki failed to continue.

“Special. Unique.” The words felt horribly inadequate.

“I don’t know what to say to that.”

“Then say nothing.” Loki tugged on the mortal’s hand. “Come, let us talk in a more comfortable place.”

The two of them sat on the sofa facing each other, long legs touching. The cloth of Loki’s black jeans prevented direct skin contact, so they did not spark.

“So, I really am curious to compare notes,” said Tom. “When is it for you?”

Loki raised an eyebrow.

“I mean, what’s been going on? You’ve been to Sakaar.”

Loki nodded, his face blank. “Asgard is gone. We travel to Midgard.”

Tom bit his lip. “Are you alright?”

The god looked at Tom for a long moment and let his mask of neutrality fall. “I am not.”

“You feel responsible.”

Loki pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. “I destroyed Asgard.”

“Thor told you to. And you know it was the only way.” Tom put a hand on Loki’s leg and squeezed gently. “It isn’t your fault.”

“I should have been able to figure something out. Another way.”

Tom shook his head. “Loki, look at me.”

The god opened his eyes and Tom saw deep weariness.

“It wasn’t your fault. I know you thought of that plan far before Thor did.” Loki’s eyes widened as Tom spoke. “You didn’t want to do it, but you _had_ to.”

“I have seen your myths of myself; that I was destined to doom my own realm and people. Destroy the world. I never wished that, no matter how much I hated them.”

“I know. I believe you. You _saved_ them.”

Loki let out a long breath. “They will not love me for it.”

“Thor loves you for it.”

Loki flinched and looked away. “My dearest brother does not trust me, and he is right not too.”

“He knows you for who you are and still loves you.”

The god shook his head and looked down at his hands. “I do not wish to speak of Thor any longer.”

“If that’s what you want.”

“I cannot mend our relationship to what it once was, and I want - need - to move past it.”

Tom nodded and squeezed Loki’s leg again. “I understand.”

“I am beginning to believe you truly do.” Loki smiled a small sad smile at the actor, then yawned. “My apologies.”

Tom laughed. “It’s okay. Maybe a nap?”

“Gods do not ‘nap’.” He said it with his nose in the air, lips pressed into a thin line.

This made Tom laugh harder. “Seriously?”

Loki dropped the expression and grinned at him. “No. I have been known to nap from time to time.” He yawned again. “And even enjoyed it.”

“Alright god of naps, I’ll let you rest.” Tom disentangled himself from sofa and pulled the afghan that lay on the back it over the Loki’s legs. “I’ll wake you for lunch.”

With a nod and another yawn, Loki slid himself further down on the sofa and pulled the blanket up over his shoulders.

Tom went off to his office to let Loki sleep and puttered around quietly until he started to get hungry. He snuck through the sitting room and spared a fond look at the sleeping god. Loki’s hair had gone fluffy again and was covering most of his face. It was hard to look at him and think that this was likely the single most powerful entity on the planet. He didn’t _look_ dangerous. He looked… adorable.

Tom shook himself and went into the kitchen to prepare lunch for them. Loki had said that they would need to eat well, so he made a more elaborate lunch than he usually would and cooked rather than throwing together a sandwich.

When he came back to check on him, Loki was peeking over the blanket with sleepy green eyes. The god ran a hand over his messy hair, smoothing it to perfection.

“Magical hair product?” Tom asked. “Useful.”

Loki snorted. “It’s a very simple spell, one that most girls learn when they begin their training.”

“Is seidr usage as gendered as the mythology states?” Tom asked, frowning slightly. “It didn’t come up for us really. Well, a little, but…” He shrugged.

“Being a seidmadr is considered… unmanly, yes.” Loki kept his expression carefully blank. “Yet another reason why Thor was favored over myself. My willingness to be taken by men just proved that the tales are true.”

The human’s frown deepened into a confused scowl. “Wouldn’t that apply to Thor as well? If you two were involved?”

Loki’s eyebrows went up. “He would not have allowed me to use him thus.”

“Okay…” Tom was confused. “This must be a cultural thing I’m not getting.”

“Is it not the same here?”

“That being involved with another man is ‘unmanly’? In some places, yes. Historically speaking it was all over the map, though these days gay men have a reputation for being _extremely_ manly in certain ways.” He shrugged. “I could discuss the ancient Greeks but I don’t think you really want a history lesson. 

Loki shook his head. “Your realm is very strange.”

“I could say the same to you.”

Loki laughed. “I suppose you could.”

“I was coming to wake you; the food is ready if you’re hungry.”

The god nodded and stood, stretching like a cat. The black tee-shirt rode up exposing an expanse of pale, toned abs which Tom decided he would definitely _not_ stare at. Really. _I’m getting narcissistic in my old age._

The pair ate - Tom again giving Loki more of the food - and chatted about their different experiences. So far, everything either of them had brought up had correlated or hadn’t come up for Tom-as-Loki.

As Loki spoke, Tom found that many of his own theories about the god’s past were accurate. Loki talked of how Frigga had had taught him magic and had spent time teaching him her own fighting style. The standard Asgardian training worked for bulky people--that is to say, men--but was little use for a quick and agile fighter like Loki.

They spoke only a little of Loki’s mother since he knew her death still pained the god.  He cared less about Odin’s death, even though it was far fresher. The All Father’s acknowledgement confused him--he even found himself unexpectedly touched--but he still bore too much resentment for the lies and ill treatment.

Neither brought up the Fall, the Chitauri, or Thanos. Especially not Thanos. 

They could work through all of that in time, Tom thought. He wanted Loki as stable as possible. For more than one reason.

“I will be ready very shortly.”

“Oh.” Tom was surprised that Loki changed the topic so abruptly, but maybe he shouldn’t have been. The mercurial god seemed to change the subject when he was uncomfortable. “Okay. What do we need to do?”

“It would be best if we were in a relaxed position, since we shall be leaving our bodies behind.”

“Umm… will the sofa do? Or…?”

“I found that laying down is the best option for astral projection of any kind.”

“So the bed would be better?”

“Yes.” Loki tapped a long finger to his lips. “We shall need to be touching as well.”

Tom blushed, but nodded. “That makes sense.”

“It took Strange and myself an embarrassingly long time to realize that.” Loki smiled. “Then again, we were not inclined to work together, let alone be in physical contact.”

 _Not like us_. The words hung unspoken.

“So, comfortable, touching. Anything else?”

“This first attempt will be something of an experiment, as I said, so I do not know where we will end up. There should be nothing able to imperil us, but it would be well if you knew how to remove yourself.”

“Remove myself? Get back here you mean? Would I just do what I did before to get out of your mind?”

“Exactly.” Loki smiled. “Now that you are aware of it, you should be able to sense the line that tethers your astral self to you physical body. Simply tug on the line as you did before and you will return.”

Tom nodded. “I can do that.”

“Ideally we will be leaving together, but if you find yourself in danger, do not hesitate.” Loki thought for a moment. “Although you may find that it is not possible at first.”

“What do you mean?”

“I will endeavor to shield you from this, but the transition is tiring. It is impossible to return within the first few minutes of ‘landing’ in a new body.”

Tom paled and tugged at his collar. “You must have tried it.”

“I did.”

“Why?”

Loki fell silent.

“You ended up in a situation that you didn’t want.” Tom looked carefully at Loki’s face and saw a tiny twitch of the lips “What did you do?”

“I escaped a different way.”

Tom frowned. “How?”

“By ceding control to the host body and retreating into his mindscape.” Loki pushed his plate away, eyes on the plate, avoiding Tom’s gaze. “It was a better alternative, but I don’t recommend it.”

“I’ll keep it in mind.”

“Very well, shall we?”

Tom lead Loki upstairs to his bedroom and tried to convince himself that the feeling in his stomach was because they were leaving soon and for no other reason. He found it harder to keep that lie alive once they lay down, facing one another. It was impossible once Loki’s hand gripped his own and the magic flared between them.

Azure light sprang from nothingness in the god’s other hand as Loki summoned the Tesseract.

“Put your fingers through here, as I do.”

Tom slipped his fingers into the place’s Loki hand indicated and touched the warm/cold vibrance that was the Tesseract. It was singing.

“Are you ready?”

Tom nodded, unwilling to trust his voice.

Loki whispered something Tom could not understand. He could feel the seidr burning through them, could feel the Tesseract serenade his soul and his nerves. He threw his head back with a cry as it sucked his mind from his body and drew them both into nothingness.


	8. The Realm of the Endless

 

The room was cozy, warm and lightly shadowed. He sat on a raised hearth, fire burning brightly at his back. A vague scent of burnt feathers and charred meat hovered in the air, but it was faint, like an illusion of scent. He could feel the power of the flames as though it were his own seidr. With barely a thought, he made the flames leap.

Loki smiled.

There was so much power in this form. It was ancient and strong. Bitter. Angry. Chaos itself.

He breathed and the flames rose with every inhalation, then fell as he exhaled. It would be nothing to burn this place to the ground; a snap of the fingers.

Flame had never called to him so, even before he learned that he was a creature of ice.

“Loki?”

A familiar voice. He struggled to pull himself away from the fire, towards whomever spoke to him.

Another figure occupied in the room. Man-shaped, but neither human nor Aesir. He was nude, but covered in short brown fur, long hair the same color as the fur swept up and back. His mouth was too large and had far too many teeth., His ears ended in long points. He stared at Loki with frightened blue eyes.

“Tom?” Loki focused. He could sense his mortal’s mind behind this strange visage.

The other nodded. “You don’t look like yourself.”

“Neither do you.”

“What’s going on?”

“I do not know, but it is _wonderous._ ” Loki called the fire again, bathing the room in warm golden light.

Tom stepped forward, ignoring the flairing flames. He reached tentatively towards Loki’s face. He was so much shorter than the god now that his fingertips barely brushed the other’s cheek.

“Your hair looks like... fire.”

“I _feel_ like fire.”

“Why do you look like this? Why are so much taller now?”

“You are Fae.”

“What?”

“The body you possess is that of a Faerie. Have you ever portrayed such a creature?”

Oddly arched browns drew down. “I was Puck in a production of ‘Midsummer Night's Dream’ back at school.”

“Perhaps that is why.”

“Then why do you…” Tom shook his head then his eyes widened. “You’re Loki.”

“Obviously.”

“No, I mean, you’re a _different_ Loki. The mythological one.”

“I…” For some reason this bothered the god; that there could be more than one of _him._ The hearth darkened along with his countenance, and the flames drew down to their coals. “I do not l care for that.”

“I don’t really like being furry and naked,” Tom retorted and crossed his arms over this chest.

Loki sniggered. Tom smiled, then laughed and Loki found he couldn’t help laughing aloud as well. Laughter in this form felt effortless to each of them, as though it was their natural state.

“I wonder if you have access to the magic of your form?”

“What kind of magic?” Tom raised a single inhuman eyebrow.

“Likely you can shapeshift or cast a glamour upon yourself. Since you object to your current nudity and furriness, I would suggest you try.” Loki put his hand under the other’s chin, tilting his face up towards him. “Focus on your true form. Will your body into its correct shape.”

Tom closed his eyes and _breathed._  A shimmer of pale blue magic appeared around his body and, torturously slowly, he _changed._ Grew taller, fur melted away, the animalistic features shifted, receded.

“Well done.” Loki grinned. “We shall make a seidrmadr out of you yet.”

The human blushed. He looked like his normal self except for delicately pointed ears. He was dressed now - _Pity_ \- but in green breaches that sparkled faintly and a sleeveless green tunic of the same material.

Tom looked down at himself. “I did not mean to be wearing this.”

“It is an unusual look for a human.”

“I think this is the costume I wore as Puck.”

“Were you thinking about your clothes?”

“Not especially.”

Loki shrugged. His own clothing appeared to be fairly normal. By Midgardian standards, if not his own. “Try again and think about what you are wearing.”

Tom closed his eyes and again the shimmer of magic covered his form. This time he wore a white button-down shirt and jeans. His ears were still pointed. Loki decided he liked the ears and didn’t say anything.

“Very well done.”

Tom grinned. “Now what?”

“What would you care to do? There is a great deal of magic in this world.” Loki held out his hands by his sides and lifted them. Flames sparked to life in his palms. “I can feel it just below the surface. It is much stronger than on your Midgard.”

“But you’re wearing normal clothes.”

Loki grinned. “There are many Midgards, it seems. This one is neither yours nor mine. Shall we go and explore?”

Tom smiled. “That’s what we’re here for, right?”

“Let’s go then.” Loki headed for the door.

“You should, uh probably look less like your hair is on fire.”

“Ah, yes.” Loki briefly closed his eyes. This body seemed to have a preference for a human guise - he could feel it just beyond the godly form he currently wore, so he slipped into it. “What do I look like?”

“You’re ginger. Don’t look anything like yourself.”

“Ginger?”

“Your hair is red. Like normal coppery red, not blood red.”

Loki shrugged. It would do. He headed for the door again. Tom followed. “Why is having red hair called ‘ginger’? The rhizome is not that color.”

Tom laughed. “I’m not sure, I’ve never thought about it. I guess gingers are thought to have spicy personalities?”

Loki shook his head at the absurdity of mortals.

 

They were in a city, though not one that Loki recognised. It was certainly nothing like any of the Nine Realms other than Midgard. Tom commented that it looked like a city from his world, but from when he was a child. Loki took his word for it.

This exact city might not even exist in either of their realms for all he knew. There was a simmering feeling to the streets. Another world existed below this mundane view, one alive with other-planar creatures. And magic. And blood.

“Do you sense it?”

“What?” Tom closed his eyes and cocked his head to the side. “I can almost hear something.”

“Yes. I can feel a prickle of seidr on my skin. We can draw back the veil and step through if we wish.” He grinned at his mortal, eyes alight with a flame he could feel. He held out a hand. “Shall we?”

Tom smiled and took the outstretched hand. “Yes.”

The world rippled as Loki waved his free hand and the two men vanished from the street.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the record, I have no idea if Tom ever played Puck at school, but it seems like he’d be very good at the role. 
> 
> This is taken from _The Kindly Ones_ , volume 9 of _Sandman_ by Neil Gaiman.


	9. The Realm of the Endless Part II

 

The city street didn't vanish to Tom’s eyes, it morphed into a beaten pathway. The concrete buildings became market stalls. The sky took on the color of tangerines streaked with gray clouds. The people who had been walking the streets became creatures. Creatures out of myths and stories and fantasy, of every kind Tom could imagine, and some he had never even read about.

When researching for “Crimson Peak”, he had watched all of Guillermo del Toro’s films - and had kept up since. More than anything, this reminded him of the Market from Hellboy II. Seeing it on screen was one thing. Seeing it in person… Well. It was impressive to say the least.

Loki looked completely at home in a way that hadn’t looked back on Earth, or even inside Tom’s mind. His alien shoulders were relaxed and a small smile played on his lips. His face was different, but Loki’s smiles were the same. He _belonged_ here, even though this wasn’t his home.

Tom tagged along behind the god gaping at everything, everyone. He had to keep his hands locked behind his back just to keep from touching something that might be dangerous. It only took one marble statue of a snapping turtle that tried to bite him to teach him that.

A female centaur stood inside a shop selling vials of strangely colored liquids that smelled of herbs and brimstone. The one directly across the way was kept by a faun with dark purple fur and tightly spiralled horns. This stall had hundreds of copper and bronze trinkets in the shapes of cookery equipment and household tools. The faun explained to them that they were charms made for him by a Brownie clan “back in the old country”. He’d addressed Loki as “Lord Liesmith” without introduction, confirming that he’d been right; this was another Loki.

They sampled fruit from a world that Tom had never heard of, which tasted like honey and sunshine.  And another that looked like an orange, but the segments were pale green and tasted like thyme and allspice. Loki traded the fruit seller a story for a bag of different items, and they nibbled at them as they wandered through the bazaar.  

They walked for what seemed like hours, sampling foods like Tom had never seen, listening to music unlike anything from Earth. Music that resonated from inside of his bones, or was made of vibrant colors rather than notes, but was still somehow music. They glimpsed magical creatures and devices, items of power which Loki warned him not to touch. Tom had imagined going to Asgard - long before he’d ever known it was a real place - and this was far stranger and more wondrous than even that.

Eventually they were both tired and settled into a pub for a few drinks and more substantial food. Again, Loki traded stories for their sustenance. Apparently tales were a common form of currency here, which made things easier.

“This has been amazing. Thank you so much for bringing me here.”

“Of course.” Loki smiled at him. “I am pleased we found such a marvelous realm on our first attempt. It could easily have been quite mundane.”

“I wish we could bring home souvenirs.” Tom poked at the flowers on their table, which sparkled and changed from violet to red.

Loki laughed. “It’s likely best we cannot.”  

“You’re probably right.”

Loki laid a hand on his shoulder. “How are you feeling?”

“Getting a bit tired.”

“We should leave soon.”

Tom yawned. “You’re right about that too.”

“Shall we?”

He nodded.

They left the bar and found a dark alley, out of the way of the bustle and crowd. Loki held out his hand and Tom took it. “Pull back on my count. Three, two, one.”

Tom pulled on the line back to his body as Loki had taught him, and felt the world fall away.


	10. Chapter 10

 

Awareness returned slowly. The first thing that he noticed was a hand holding his and the seidr flowing between them. Loki opened his eyes and smiled at the mortal in front of him. _His_ mortal. When did he start thinking of Tom thusly? It hardly mattered. Loki had claimed the mortal, and had been claimed in return. Their bond was writ large for anyone with the ability to see. Oh, how Thor would laugh at him. After all of Loki’s tormenting over his brother’s relationship with Jane - only _partially_ born of jealousy - here Loki was, falling for a mortal. And falling he was.

Tom’s eyes remained closed. His beautiful, changing eyes. Loki vanished the Tesseract from their hands and reached up to touch the Tom’s face. He brushed the tips of his fingers along his cheekbone, then cupped his jaw, thankful that the other had shaved since they first “met”. The scruff of beard under his hand was… an unpleasant memory now.

Tom’s eyelids fluttered and he leaned into Loki’s touch.  Loki, in turn, pushed a tiny bit of magic through his hand and the mortal moaned, and opened his eyes showing a thin ring of blue.

“Hello.” Tom smiled.

Loki returned the smile and stroked Tom’s cheek with a thumb. “How are you feeling?"

“Well.”

“I’m glad.”

“Yes?”

“Do you doubt me?” Loki affected an air of offence he didn’t feel.

“No.” Tom smiled; he wasn’t fooled. He threaded his fingers through the god’s hair. “I just don’t really understand.”

“Do you not?”

Tom shook his head.

“It has been a very long time since I have met anyone I wish to spend my time with,” Loki admitted. “I am… pleased that I can show you these things.”

“But...” Tom took a deep breath, as though he didn’t want to ask the question. “Why me?”

Loki pondered the question. “You understand. You do not question me. You _know_ me. Despite this, you seem to care.”

“I do.”

“And, it does not hurt that you are quite beautiful.”

Tom’s eyes widened, and for a moment Loki regretted his admission. Then the mortal leaned forward and kissed him. _Oh. So that’s what that look means._ Tom wasn’t afraid of Loki, he  _wanted_ him, and was - perhaps - afraid of that wanting. Loki himself had desired nothing more than to kiss the mortal since they met, so he met the insistent warm lips on his own with pressure of his own.

Tom pulled away and smiled. It was glorious. Loki pulled him back for another kiss, this time sliding his tongue along the actor’s lower lip before delving into his mouth. He tasted like tea and sunlight. His skin was smooth, like warmed marble, the morning’s beard growth a pleasant rasp under his fingers and palm. Loki swept a hand up into the mortal’s hair, fingers tangling in the fascinating silky curls.

Tom pulled away again to breathe. “I’m glad you’re just as narcissistic as I am.”

Loki laughed. “I would be a fool to not recognize such beauty before me. Though I must say I find your visage more appealing than my own.”

“It’s just different enough.” It was a statement, not a question.

Loki hummed in agreement, though that wasn’t what he’d meant, and went in for another kiss. Tom moaned as their tongues tangled together and gasped into Loki’s lips as the god sent a pulse of magic through his mouth.

“God, that is…”

“Fascinating.”

“I was going to say intoxicating, but I’m glad you find my reactions of academic interest.”

“Oh I think I can do better than that.” Loki brushed his fingertips down Tom’s jaw, releasing a trickle of seidr. The mortal’s eyes fluttered as the god drew his fingers down to his perfect throat, then to his chest.

“Please tell me you have a goal here.”

“And if I do?” Loki’s hand drifted lower.

“I…” Tom moaned. “I approve.”

“I did think you might.”

 

o0o

 

Tom woke up smiling. He could feel Loki curled against his back and a hum of magic against his skin everywhere they touched. From the way that the god was breathing, he was still asleep. Tom had taken a few male lovers before - carefully hidden now - but no one who’d touched him the way that Loki did, like he was made of glass. It might just be that Loki was worried about hurting Tom with his superior strength, but it felt more like Loki couldn’t quite believe that Tom was accepting his touch at all, like the mortal might be snatched away at any moment.

Tom also got the impression that Loki was feeling out what he would accept _very_ carefully. He saw how the god was constantly checking on him with questioning looks, though he never outright asked “is this alright?” or “may I do this?” with anything other than his eyes. It was a gentleness that Tom hadn’t expected from a god whose motto was “I do what I want”. But it was wonderful. The memory of Loki’s hands and mouth on his body, the appreciative sounds he had made when he returned the motions. He hoped Loki would wake soon.

He squirmed in the god’s arms to turn around and face his doppleganger. Loki looked younger asleep. Honestly, Loki looked younger than Tom himself anyway - in his twenties rather than thirties - but the god’s expressions made him look older. Tom wondered how Jotuns aged in comparison to the Aesir, and if Thor looked like a younger Chris. He would never ask.

He brushed the backs of his fingers against Loki’s cheek, not surprised to find it smooth. Tom had always been shaved to within an inch of his life before having makeup applied to play the god.

Loki opened his eyes. They were a slightly different color than Tom’s, a pale gray-green that his own eyes would only go under specific lighting. He’d never seen them change to the blue that his own were in natural sunlight. Then again, the two of them hadn’t left the flat.

Loki smiled at him. It was a gentle, hesitant smile. An “I just woke up in bed with someone I’ve slept with for the first time” smile. A “do you still want me here?” smile. In answer, Tom kissed him. Shifted his hips forward to prove it further. To say, here, yes. I still want you.

It was a while before they got out of bed.

 

o0o

 

Tom cooked breakfast again. It was closer to tea time, but since they just woke up breakfast seemed more appropriate. He’d need to shop soon; Loki ate a lot, and Tom had been shopping for one the last time he’d gone to the market.

Loki wandered into the kitchen, teacup in hand, and kissed Tom’s cheek before moving on to the fridge. The god grabbed a chilled apple and meandered back to Tom’s side. “May I help?”

“I’m almost done, thanks. You can help with supper. Lunch. Whatever our next meal turns out to be.”

Loki nodded and moved to the breakfast bar, biting into his apple. So far Tom knew that Loki preferred his fruit cold and his tea black.

“What is food on Asgard like,” he asked.

“Stolid,” Loki replied. “Meat, bread, fruit.” He held up the apple. “Of course on the ship it is mostly packaged rations.”

“Did you… did you tell anyone” _Thor_  “where you were going?”

Loki looked at him as though he was mad. “Of course not.”

“Will they worry?”

Loki shrugged and looked unconcerned. “I doubt it.”

Tom thought about bringing up Thor, but decided that he’d rather Loki kept his attention on his new lover, not a former one. “I do what I want” indeed. Then again, Loki might honestly believe no one back in his universe actually cared about what happened to him. Tom’s heart ached at the thought. It was all too likely. He knew how fragile Loki’s self esteem was beneath his bravado. 

So when he joined the god at the eating bar, he kissed Loki's cheek before sitting across from him with his own food. If he could convince Loki that he was appreciated, desired, _loved,_  it could only help. Becoming lovers was not something he had anticipated, but he was happy to embrace it for so many reasons. He wanted Loki to stay with him forever. 

“How draining was our ‘outing’ for you?”

“More so than previously,” Loki admitted. “But being able to rest and eat is most helpful. I should be ready for another trip later today.”

Tom nodded. “I'm happy with whatever you'd like to do. I've only seen a few things your magic can do, and I would be pleased to see more if you want to take more of a break. Not to mention other activities.”

Loki grinned. “Why not both?”

“Both, both is good.” Tom leaned over to kiss him. “I like both a lot.”

The god purred. “I am most pleased to assist.”

 

It was much later that they finally got around to setting off again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand they finally got to it! 
> 
> Unfortunately I am not really capable of writing smut, so fade-to-black will have to do. Use your imaginations.


	11. Neopolis

 

 

Loki felt gentle flame on his skin. Much as before, it sang to him with sweet destruction, this time even more a part of him. This body had magic, though it was of a different quality than his own or that of his previous host.

_Loki?_

Tom’s frightened voice came from within Loki’s mind, not to his ears.

 _It appears we are sharing a body this time._ Loki replied silently. _Are you alright?_

A frustrated sigh. _I can’t see._

Loki opened his eyes and saw a pub crowded with all manner of beings. He was leaning casually on the bar, and he held a flaming drinking horn in his hand. _Can you see now?_

_Yes. Is that drink on fire?_

_It appears to be, yes._

He could feel Tom’s curiosity coiling in his stomach as the mortal used their shared eyes to look around the room. _I recognize some of these… people._

 _Oh?_ Loki glanced about. He knew none of the faces, though he spied a one-eyed man across the way…

 _Yes, these are all deities from human pantheons. There’s Shiva, Amaterasu, the Morrigan._ He felt Tom’s attention light on a nearly nude, blue skinned, many armed man, a woman who might have been from Vanaheim in elaborate gold and green silks, and a woman clothed in black armor who reminded Loki forcefully of Hela, a raven perched on her shoulder. _I think that’s Zeus,_ he said, nodding towards an old man with a cheeky smile and lightning in his eyes. He resembled an aged Thor with both his eyes intact, Loki thought, grown to look like their father.

 _Do you think that is Fa… Odin over there?_ He brought Tom’s attention to the one-eyed man. 

 _Likely_ , said Tom. _His clothing is right._ He paused, _If this is human mythology rather than M... our interpretation of it, he’s your blood-brother, not your father._

Loki blinked. _What?_

 _The story goes that Odin… Wotan, whatever, and Loki swore blood brotherhood because,_ Tom laughed, _because Loki was so beautiful. I’ve always thought there might have been something euphemistic about “blood-brothers” in this context._

Loki gagged. _That is quite disgusting._

He could hear Tom’s laughter bright in his head, and felt his physical lips twitch in response. _You realize that’s fairly ridiculous, yes?_

 _Yes. You needn’t point it out._  

Tom continued to laugh, making Loki smile. He reflected that if another person had laughed at him so, it would have made him furious. But Tom made him feel he was part of the joke instead of the butt of it.

It was nice to laugh with someone again. He took a sip of the flaming drink. Mead. It wasn’t bad.

 _You’re thinking something,_ Tom said after a moment.

_You cannot hear me?_

_It’s like you’re talking quietly in the next room,_ Tom explained _. I know it’s there but I can’t quite hear it._

 _I was thinking we should cause some mischief._ This was only a tiny fraction of what he was thinking, but he wasn’t willing to share how much these simple, friendly interactions meant to him.

 _What did you have in mind?_ Tom’s voice grinned.

As Loki had suspected, his mortal had a wide trickster streak himself. _Who are the players here? I am not familiar with the gods of your realm._

_I can’t be certain of everyone. The Greek gods are obvious, but I was never a mythology scholar or anything._

Loki snorted at “mythology”. The gods stood before them, so could hardly be called myths. _Your knowledge vastly exceeds mine. Given the changes to my own... pantheon, what I know may be exceedingly incorrect._

He felt Tom shrug, then point out a dozen or so deities about the room he recognized. He explained what “their deal was” as well. Gods of destruction and chaos like himself, gods of the sun, the moon, contemplation, magic. It’s wasn’t until the door opened and a new pair of men walked in that Loki’s mind went alight.

He didn’t recognise either of them. One was bald with a overly long ginger fringe and an enormous beard, the other blond and unbelievably beautiful, dressed in something akin to the most elegant of Asgardian fashion. However little he recognized their faces, the stylized hammer hanging from the bald one’s belt was clear enough. _Thor._  The pair had their arms wrapped around one another, laughing at some previously told jest. He hated them on sight.

_Loki? You alright?_

_Who is with Thor?_ His mind voice was tight with anger.

_Um… Probably Baldr, given how pretty he is._

_Baldr?_

_Umm…_

_Tom?_ Why was his mortal hesitating?

_His brother._

Loki felt as if a bucket of ice water had been thrown over his whole body. _His_ **_what_ ** _?_

_Sorry._

Loki fought to keep his rage in check; the flame on his head flared brightly. Whatever pleasure at seeing how _unattractive_ Thor’s visage was in this realm was lost to the sheer fury at seeing this beautiful example of the Asgardian ideal on his brother’s arm.

 _He’s not your brother._ Tom assured him along with a spectral hug.

Loki started; he hadn't realized he’d been thinking so loudly. Tom was right, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t still want to destroy that pretty face.

A phantom hand soothed down his back. Loki felt no condemnation of his rage, his need to destroy - neither of which he couldn’t possibly hide at this point - just acceptance and the will to mitigate his distress.

_Oh._

Tension drained from Loki’s body in a rush. He still wanted to _break_ something, but the mania had vanished. _So, tell me about this… Baldr._ He hid the curl of his lip with the drinking horn.

_He’s the god of beauty and light and all kinds of happy things, everyone loves him, almost completely indestructible. Very hateable; just begging to be murdered._

Loki choked on his own laughter - and the mead - at his mortal’s assessment. _You don’t say?_

_Oh yeah. What self respecting Trickster could resist figuring out a clever way of destroying that oh-so-perfect god?_

Loki laughed aloud. _I had no idea you had it in you._

_My sympathy is entirely with the mythological Loki on this one._

_So Baldr is killed by this incarnation of myself?_

Tom explained how much cleverer not-Loki’s plan was than a straightforward murder; about the blind brother Hod, the mistletoe which was left out of the pact to never harm the god, and Baldr’s hubris.

_Preposterous._

_Isn’t it? Mythology has a way of making everything feel inevitable without making any sense at all._

_It is very tempting..._  Conjuring a sprig of mistletoe would be effortless. It might be more difficult to make into something lethal like an arrow. A dart perhaps?

Tom interrupted his train of thought. _No, bad idea._

Loki snarled.

_We can’t put your other self here in danger._

_How is this dangerous? Baldr shall die and another will take the blame. And since that other is a beloved child of Odin, he shall see no repercussions._

_Umm… Loki gets caught._  

_Caught?_

_Yes._ Tom sounded sad.

 _And punished. Imprisoned?_ If a child of Odin died, dire punishment would be inevitable. His own transgressions had been far less, though he’d tried to kill Thor. Ostensibly that wasn’t what he had been punished for, but Loki knew the truth. Odin would hardly care about the death of a few mortals or frost giants. The attempted murder of of his own son, however…  

Tom ran a phantom hand down his back. _It’s… it’s worse than what happened to you. A lot worse._

This made Loki’s blood run cold. _How worse?_

_They actually torture him. He’s bound to a rock with entrails and venom drips into his eyes for hundreds of years._

Loki shuddered. _Maybe I should just kill Odin instead._

 _It probably wouldn’t help._ Loki felt a hand on his back moving in small circles.

_So you are saying I should not kill anyone?_

Tom laughed lightly. _I’d prefer not be responsible for any of your other selves getting tortured, thanks._

_You are correct. It would be injudicious to cause harm to our unwitting host._

He could feel Tom relax. _I bet we can cause some mayhem_ **_without_ ** _getting caught._

Loki grinned. _I knew there was a reason I spent time with you._

_And here I thought it was just my charm and good looks._

_That may be a factor as well._

Tom laughed. _So what do you think?_

Loki looked around the room again. He avoided focusing on the Aesir; there were so many other deities here.

In the end they came up with an elaborate plan which relied on perfect timing, Tom’s knowledge of mythological temperament, and a simple illusion. The perfectly executed chain reaction resulted in several gods tripping over nothing and sprawling to the floor, and most of the bar being covered in various alcoholic beverages. That Odin’s helm was set on fire was a nice bonus.

Loki and Tom laughed internally, even as their godly body cleaned the flaming mead from his boot with a look of utter disdain. After all, he was less likely to be suspected if he’d taken some of the flack as well.

Loki sensed Tom’s sudden fatigue as he sipped a fresh horn of mead. _Shall we go?_

The mortal sleepily assented, and they fled the body together.

 

Moments later the godly body’s usual inhabitant returned. He looked around, took in the chaos with a smile and turned to Baldur. “So, shall we play the ‘throwing things’ game?”

“Oh yes, uncle. Everyone! Throw things at me to prove my invulnerability!”

Lokk smiled. Baldur fell for it _every damned time._  Idiot.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is taken from issue 7 of Top Ten by Alan Moore. 
> 
>  
> 
> The spelling changes at the end are intentional.


	12. Chapter 12

 

Tom pulled himself from the bath slowly, stretching his arms, back, and hips. The water had soothed his sore muscles, but was now grown tepid. His body felt limp and languid. He ached pleasantly in new places. An enlightening conversation with Loki about Asgardian sexual taboos had ended _very_ interestingly, and Tom now found it difficult to stand, let alone walk. Once he’d convinced Loki that he was _fine_ \- better than fine - the god had laughed and left him to soak. He had avoided Tom’s playful splashing so as not get his sharp black jeans wet, and fled.

Now nearly an hour later, Tom patted his skin dry and toweled his hair to damp fluffiness. He could only manage to wear a pair of loose running shorts and a tee-shirt, gray to contrast with Loki’s black. Not that he too occupied with his wardrobe. He was thinking of Loki’s long limbs dressed in _his_ clothes, which felt more intimate than it probably should have. Even if it did mean that the god had commandeered all of his black clothing.

Tom entered the sitting room to find Loki using his laptop. This hadn’t happened before, though the god had mentioned he’d used Tom’s computer previously.

_I should probably change my password..._

Loki burst out laughing as Tom walked in. He was looking at the device, not his lover.

“What’s so funny?”

Loki turned the computer, still laughing. He’d found a photo of Tom in costume on the set of “Avengers” holding Mjolnir and Captain America’s shield, shouting in triumph.

“Oh yeah, that was fun.” Tom sat down on the sofa by the god and suppressed a wince. “I stole the Mjolnir prop all the time. Chris got so angry when I wouldn’t give it back.”

“Chris?”

“My Thor,” Tom explained. “Actually, the actor who plays Captain America is also called Chris.”

Loki hummed, but didn’t comment further. He was still snickering at the photograph. “How I wish I could have done that.”

“I did my best to create as much mischief on set as I could without being a complete arse.”

“Such as?”

“Oh, nicking props, people’s drinks. I put itching powder in Iron Man’s suit.”

It was minor mayhem, but Loki grinned. “You have chaos in your soul.”

“From time to time.” Tom kissed Loki’s cheek. “How did you find this?”

“I was looking for images of your acting to see if I could identify any possible universes to travel to.” Loki rubbed his lower lip absently. “I admit I may have gotten a touch distracted by your portrayal of myself.”

“That’s only natural. I mean, that’s what I would look for if I were you.”

“Indeed. Though I still do not wish to watch your films.”

Tom sighed. “I understand. It’s probably for the best, really.”

Loki kissed Tom’s temple and continued. “I believe I may have discerned why we have not entered any of your film worlds, and can correct it. Is there anywhere you wish to go above others?”

“I… Yes.” That actually wasn’t a tough question at all. “ _The Hollow Crown_ or maybe _Corelainus._ To actually experience a world created by Shakespeare. I would love that.” Tom grinned at the thought.

“Will you show me?” Loki handed him the laptop. Tom pulled up a handful of production shots of himself as Prince Hal. “Beautiful.” The word escaped Loki’s lips. “Yes, we shall go there if we can.”

Tom grinned.

“I am uncertain that I can guide us to a specific realm, but I shall endeavour to do so. It may take a few attempts.”

“I’m happy to just experience this with you.”

Loki smiled at him. “As am I.”

“No regrets?”

Loki paused, then spoke quietly. “Only that I did not come here sooner.”

Tom leaned in to kiss the god. As they touched a heady rush of Loki’s seidr flowed through their lips. All of Tom’s aches faded into the background and they fell into a tangle of limbs on the sofa, the computer forgotten on the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven’t already seen the photo of Tom with the shield and Mjolnir (and I would be shocked if you haven’t, knowing my audience) I suggest looking it up, since it’s hilarious. I haven’t been able to confirm the “itching powder in the Iron Man suit story, but I’m going with it!


	13. London

 

Tom felt drained, shaky, light headed. It was physical, not mental; his body quivered with adrenaline and alcohol, and his right hand ached. He looked down; the skin was broken across the knuckles, blood dripped sluggishly along his long fingers.

It was his hand. _Actually_ his hand. Not furry, not godly. His.

Tom looked up and saw a mirror covered in a spiderweb of cracks. _That explains the bleeding_. Behind the cracks, his own face stared back at him. Maybe a little older. The hair between brown and blond, and hacked unevenly, curling in an unflattering way around his head. He looked down again. He was in a bath, he realized. He stood between an old iron tub and simple vanity. A pair of scissors lay on the tile floor along with what looked like ten years growth of long curly golden brown hair. His hair had never been that long. Loki’s was, but not his.

Wait, where was Loki?

“Loki?”

His voice resonated in the small chamber, but he heard no answer.

“Loki, are you here?”

Tom grew a bit nervous now. “Please answer me.”

 _Tom._ The god’s mind voice sounded strained.

“Where are you? I can’t feel you.”

_There is another presence in this host’s mind. I am attempting to... deal with it._

“Deal with it?”

 _Yes._ The single syllable echoed in Tom’s head, sweet and dark and violent. He shivered.

“Where are we?”

_Do you not recognize this place?_

Tom looked around again, then peeked outside the door into an unfamiliar hallway. “No.” He shook his head and grabbed some loo-paper to staunch the bleeding on the back of his hand. “I don’t think I know it. This body doesn’t feel like it has magic either.”

_And yet it is possessed._

Tom didn’t like Loki’s absence. He felt vulnerable without the god by his side or in his head. This felt more like talking to someone on the phone. Impersonal. Distant. “Can you manifest a double like we talked about before?”

_Perhaps. The other presence is fighting me. He is most determined._

“He?”

_Very._

Tom laughed, he wasn’t sure what to make of that. “Why can’t I feel him?”

_I am keeping him away from you. He is… dangerous._

“Thanks.”

 _You are most welcome._ There was a pause. _Ah, we have come to an agreement. He understands now._

“Oh?”

“Yes.” A Loki clone - adorned in an elegant black suit - appeared in the hallway. A shadow of iridescent silvery black swept over the double. It hurt Tom’s eyes to look at it. Loki’s hair was short now and he wore a sculpted beard. “We have much in common, it seems.”

“Umm…”

“Don’t worry, we can work together,” Loki’s voice was darker than usual; the cadence sounded slightly wrong as well. “It’s a pleasure to breathe again.”

“Loki?”

The other form’s focus changed and assumed Loki’s familiar smile. “I am here, Tom, do not worry. I will not allow Bishop to harm you.” He smiled. “Or do anything else, you hear me?”

His expression changed again to something dark and full of need. “Selfish.”

Loki’s laughter filled the hallway. “Entirely.”

“This is too confusing.” Tom tugged at his collar. “Please explain?”

“I brought him with me into this other body,” Loki explained. “He has not had his own in many decades.”

“Can you actually give him a seperate body? This is making me very nervous.”

Loki closed his eyes and cocked his head to the side. He frowned and began to whisper under his breath. With a a few careful, intricate gestures, another Loki appeared. A ripple of the eye-straining iridescent silver-black flowed over the new Loki and he transformed into an older man, broader of shoulder, still with raven hair and beard, but bright blue eyes. He rather looked like an older, thinner Richard Armitage to Tom.

“Ah, this is so much better.” His voice was like Richard’s, but with a touch of his own.

Loki’s first body - the one Tom recognized as _being_ Loki - rippled green. He lost the beard and his hair returned to its normal length. He turned to the second clone. “You will keep our agreement. Your previous host is not to be harmed.”

“Yes yes.”  The newcomer waved his hand dismissively and wandered out of the hallway into another room.

Tom turned to Loki. “What the hell is going on?”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “He is from another realm, like ourselves, but unable to return to his home. His previous host died and he has been haunting the form you currently inhabit in this realm.”

“What?”

The god shrugged. “That is what he has told me, and I believe him. He is quite mad, but who would not be after having been trapped for years in an alien realm?”

“I don’t understand this. This is definitely my body, but I don’t recognize any of our surroundings. I thought we were trying to find one of ‘my’ universes? The ones connected to me, rather than you?”

“We were and we have.” Loki nodded to Tom’s form. “Perhaps it has not happened yet?”

“I…” Tom frowned. “I suppose that’s possible. I do look a little older.”

There was a crash from the other room and then a peal of unhinged laughter. The pair looked at one another in alarm, then rushed towards the sounds.

The Richard Armitage look-alike - Bishop, Loki had called him - held a bottle of Scotch in one hand and  stared down at the remains of a shattered tumbler on the kitchen floor.

“I’m not used to having my own hands.”

Tom gaped, then leaned on Loki’s shoulder and laughed. The laughter was just short of hysterical. This was just so odd.

Loki absently patted Tom’s back, then wrapped his arm around the mortal’s shoulders. He looked at Bishop. “How long were you incorporeal?”

“What year is it?”

Tom saw there was a copy of the Times on the table. “2004, it looks like.” That was strange.

“Just about 30 years, then.” Bishop laughed. It sounded like he was crying. “Thirty years of this hellhole planet. Thirty years of hate and hiding.” He looked the other two over. “I expect you understand.” He gestured between them.

“As I told you,” said Loki, “we are not from this realm.”

Bishop shrugged and grabbed another tumbler. This time he carefully set it on the counter before filling it with the amber alcohol. “Don’t stay then. Our kind aren’t welcome here.”

Tom blinked. Our kind?

“Ah.” Loki nodded. Clearly this made more sense to the god than it did to Tom. “We were not planning on staying long.”

Tom shook his head and trailed his fingers along Loki’s arm as he left the kitchen; he’d let Loki deal with the confusing stranger. He was more curious about his current host and this place.

The building they’d found themselves in looked like a solidly middle class flat, probably in a less fashionable part of London, based on the architecture. There was a small bedroom which looked like it only had one occupant, and another smaller room being used as an office. An old, unwieldy laptop sat on a desk covered in a familiar sight: scripts. He didn’t recognize any of the titles, but they were formatted in BBC standard for the time period. Goodness knows he’d seen enough of those in his early work as an actor.

There was a small picture frame on the floor of the office. He picked it up, careful of the smashed glass. It held an amature photo of himself - his host - and a younger woman, both in costume. They had their arms wrapped around each other, smiling. Tom didn’t know the costuming - it looked like archaic science fiction television, like something out of classic Doctor Who - but he recognized the woman under the layers of 70s makeup and outrageous hair. Or at least he thought he did. She looked like Brie Larson, but younger than when he’d worked with her on “Kong: Skull Island”. He was younger in the photo as well, perhaps in his late 20s.

“I know her,” Loki’s voice out of nowhere didn’t make Tom jump, but only because he was getting used to the god moving silently. Loki wrapped an arm around Tom’s waist and rested his chin on his shoulder, looking at the photo.

“Do you?” There were a couple of possibilities, since Loki _could_ have encountered Captain Marvel.

“Yes, she did not look like that though.” Loki took the photo. “She was in the jungle with one of our other selves. But this is not the same woman. She holds herself very differently.”

Something occurred to Tom. “Were you a vampire at some point when you were travelling to my other selves?”

“Yes,” Loki replied. He sounded… pleased?

“Did you meet anyone? A blonde vampire girl?”

“No, I’m afraid not. I was alone in that realm.”

“Ah.” He nodded. Given Adam’s reclusive nature, that had been far more likely.

“Why do you ask?”

“It might be easier to explain when we get home. I was wondering if you’d encountered the same woman - actress - twice.”

“I only met two women while I was travelling, she was one of them,” he tapped the photo, “and the other was not blonde and... onerous.”

“Okay. We’ll talk about it later.” Tom pulled away slightly, kissed Loki’s cheek and took the photo back from the god. “This is disconcerting.”

“In what way?”

“I was expecting to… to be someone, someplace I’d acted in, not something I didn’t recognize at all. And seeing a photograph of ‘me’ but in a situation I’ve never been in…” He shrugged.

Loki pulled him a little closer and kissed him chastely on the lips. Tom missed the spark of connection they had at home, but this was still very nice. Normality in a sea of confusion.

“I find it strange that we have found another traveller.”

Tom cocked his head to the side. “Do you?”

“Perhaps slipping between dimensions is more common than I thought, but it requires a tremendous amount of power and technology that is uncommon in my realm.”

“And unheard of in mine.”

Loki hummed in agreement. “But Bishop comes from an advanced civilization, so perhaps it is not so odd.”

“It was an accident.”

Tom jumped and Loki started. Both looked to the doorway to see Bishop standing there, drink in his hand.

“What was?”

Bishop looked at Tom. “I was thrown from my body and onto this planet by accident. From what you’ve been saying, it was a lot like what Loki here was describing happened to him. But I was alone. My… my… _he_ didn’t come through with me.”

Tom’s heart ached at the other man’s tone. He sounded shattered. “I’m sorry.”

Bishop flashed a mad, brilliant smile. “It’s alright. I’ll find him, and then…”

The silence stretched on. “And then?” Tom wondered aloud.

“We can go home.”

Loki frowned, but said nothing.

“What about me? I mean this host.”

Bishop shrugged. “He’s a means to an end. He has the right kind of mind.”

“What does that mean?”

The stranger shrugged. “It’s comfortable. He knows what I should be.”

Loki was frowning even harder now. Tom touched the god’s hand cautiously. “Loki?”

“I have come to believe that some sort of affinity is necessary for this mode of travel, but this does not fit with my hypothesis.” He looked at Bishop. “Your previous host, who died, what did he look like?”

“Like me.”

“Ah.” Loki relaxed.

“He was an actor.” Tom tensed at Bishop’s words. “He played ‘me’ as a part for years.” The bearded man drank down the rest of his scotch. “It was easy to live in his mind.”

“Did you take him over?” Tom wasn’t sure he wanted the answer.

“Sometimes.”

Loki pulled Tom closer to him. Tom appreciated the gesture, whether it was to comfort or protect, and clutched at the god’s hand.

“His lover looked like mine, it was so easy to be a part of their lives.” Bishop’s eyes were distant. “But they felt so much pain. This forsaken world is evil.” He hurled the tumbler to the floor where it shattered, scattering shards everywhere. Tom jumped and Loki moved in front of him entirely. “They need to pay.” Bishop’s voice was a low, furious growl.

“Bishop,” Tom waited until the other’s mad blue eyes fell on him. “I understand being hurt by others’ cruelty, but revenge won’t help. It will only make things worse.”

“You don’t understand. How can you?”

“He understands, because I understand,” Loki replied before Tom could speak. “He knows because I… I did something terribly similar. I tried to wreak vengeance on those who had harmed me by attacking those around them, and it was a grave error.”

Bishop took a threatening step forward. “You know nothing!”

Loki pulled a dagger out of nowhere and bared his teeth at the other man. “I know that if you harm him, I will destroy you and not regret it for a single second. I will rip your construct apart and ensure you are trapped and feel every shred as I do so.”

Tom squeezed his hand. “That’s not helping, love.”

The rage drained out of Loki in a rush. _Love?_  

“Why not fix the problem?” Tom asked, ignorant of his partner’s sudden mood change. “Why not do something about it instead of just... destroying?”

Bishop frowned, then nodded. “Heal instead of hurt. Yes, he would like that.” He turned away and walked out of the room, muttering to himself.

Tom’s shoulders loosened. Even if Bishop was mad, it seemed like his lover was a good man. Hopefully - whoever he was - he could help him the way that Tom was trying to help Loki.

“We should go,” the god muttered.

Tom nodded. “What will happen to him when we do?”

“He will most likely return to haunting your host.” Loki shrugged.

“I don’t think I like that.”

“I can place a compulsion on him to not harm this body,” he squeezed Tom’s hand, “but there may already be damage to his mind.”

“Which mind?”

“I meant the host’s, but it seems likely that it is both.”

Tom shook his head. “Do what you can. Hopefully he’s less inclined to murder everyone now.”

Loki snorted. Then he turned to Tom. “You must come into this form with me while I work on this.”

“How?”

Loki leaned over and kissed him, free hand touching his neck. The god sucked Tom’s essence through his lips into his own mouth and swallowed it.

_That was a very odd sensation. Pleasant though._

Loki laughed. “I shall keep that in mind. Now be still, I need to concentrate.”

Tom watched out of Loki’s eyes as he traced his fingertips over the still face of _his_ body. He could feel the distant stir of seidr in the back of his mind. It was odd to see himself from this perspective, and the more he looked, the more Tom realized that this was his body. The laugh lines around his eyes were a tiny bit deeper, but his hair was like it had been when he was younger, all fluff and curl. Those were the only differences.

Was this is a character he was _going_ to play who happened to be possessed by a character that could travel between worlds like they were doing now? That seemed like a pretty big coincidence. Then again, if he ran across such a role in the future, he’d be fairly likely take it, at least in part because it was close to his own experiences.

Tom saw his double’s eyes flutter. The body then turned - eyes still closed - and walked out of the office and into the bedroom across the hall.

_He will be more resistant to Bishop’s influence now._

“Good.” Tom took control walked into the lounge where Bishop was sitting sprawled over a chair, whiskey bottle in one hand and a third, mostly full glass in the other. “We’re leaving.”

The other man looked up. “I’ll vanish when you do.”

Loki took over their voice. “No, I shall make it so your form will fade over time.You should have several hours.”

“Thank you, it’s more than I hoped for.”

Loki reached out and twisted his hand, crooking his fingers in a peculiar pattern as he did so. Tom could feel a swell of seidr flow through their body as he did so. It was the rush of pleasure that he always felt at Loki’s magic, but also a satisfying, heavy, sweet feeling; like treacle moved effortlessly with just the mind. Their shared body shivered.

Loki nodded at Bishop, who returned the gesture. _Now Tom._ They pulled away. The body dissipated. They were gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is curious, this chapter is based on an original work of mine which I "cast". 
> 
> Bishop's idea of "healing instead of hurting" does not work out well.


	14. Chapter 14

Tom woke to a kiss against his lips. He recognised Loki’s cool, tingling mouth and inhumanly dexterous tongue seeking entrance to his own. He was barely awake, but the god  made a persuasive argument. Tom tangled his fingers in Loki’s hair, drawing the god closer as the kiss deepened. Loki groaned into his lips, and proceeded to lick every inch of his mouth, inside and out.

The god was pressed full against him, hard and insistent. It was easy to get swept away by his passion, though Tom wasn’t sure where it had come from. Usually Loki was more hesitant than this when starting out. He always made sure that Tom was comfortable with what they were doing before moving forward. The tiny rational part left of his mind was wondering if something had happened to trigger this. The rest of him didn’t care.

Making love to a god was one of the most amazing things that Tom had ever felt. It would be obvious, if anything about this impossible situation could be considered obvious. Centuries of experience and an inhuman form that brimmed with magic made for an overwhelming combination. If it weren’t for Loki’s clear appreciation of Tom’s own actions, Tom might have felt inadequate by comparison. But the god revelled in it, drinking in Tom’s attentions like he was dying of thirst.

But this felt different, how Loki was acting now. He was practically _worshiping_ Tom with his hands and mouth. Something was certainly affecting the god’s behavior, but the time Tom noticed he was too busy screaming into a pillow to think about it too much.

After an equally distracting shower, the two of them settled back on Tom’s bed, comfortably wrapped around each other. Sated, for the moment.

“Are you alright?”

“I thought I had made that abundantly clear,” Loki purred.

Tom grinned. “I did get that you were enjoying yourself, yes. That isn’t what I meant.”

The god was silent for a long moment, a look of contemplation on his face. “I am… was, appreciating what we have, I suppose.” He looks back at Tom, who couldn’t read the god’s new expression. “I do not have the words.”

“Cat got your silver tongue?”

Loki laughed, and Tom relaxed. “I think you are the one who has my tongue. You certainly make better use of it than a cat would.”

“I hope so.”

Loki smiled at him. It was unguarded and pure, full of all the emotions that the god couldn’t put voice to. So was the kiss that followed.

Tom believed he understood the god’s inability to talk about his emotions. After all, if you were known for lying, why would anyone believe what you said? He certainly wasn’t going to object to Loki expressing himself physically rather than verbally. Tom himself was highly affectionate, with friends as well as lovers, so it was easy for him to accept what the god offerred. He couldn’t always spend time with the people he loved, so he told them and showed them what they meant to him, tried to do things for and with them when he could. He hoped Loki understood. He seemed to.

“We should get out of the house for a while.” Tom had his hand resting on Loki’s shoulder and neck, so he felt the god tense. “We need more food, and some fresh air wouldn’t go amiss.”

“You would be seen in public with me?”

“Well, we might get some odd looks,” Tom allowed, “then again, it’s not like I don’t get that anyway. But I don’t have any objections to being seen with you.”

Loki gave him a small happy smile. “I would not wish to cause any difficulties for you. I can keep prying eyes from us easily enough.”

“As fun as it would be to completely break the internet, that’s probably best."

Loki raised an eyebrow.

“If someone caught us on film together, it would go viral. Tumblr would explode.”

“Dr. Strange suggested I stay away from this ‘Tumblr’,” Loki replied, tugging at his lower lip. “He seemed to think it was quite dangerous.”

Tom laughed. “It can be pretty disturbing, but it’s fun for the most part.”

“So it would be best if we did not cause it to explode?”

He laughed again and gave Loki a light kiss on the lips. “Yes.”

“Very well.” Loki rolled to his feet in a fluid, inhuman motion. “Shall we?” He held out a hand to Tom who took it. The god pulled him easily to his feet.

The now familiar snap of magic when they touched made Tom think. “Why don’t we spark in other forms?”

Loki paused in his search for clothing to look at his mortal. “That is an excellent question. I suspect that it is for the same reason that my duplicates do not cause the reaction. Nor  do our mental selves.”

Tom slipped past him into the wardrobe. He nodded. “So it’s something specifically related to our bodies?”

“It seems so. I have never experience that particular reaction before.”

“Not even with other magicians?”

Loki paused. “No. I believe it to be based on our dimensional affinity.”

“Alright.” Tom snagged appropriate clothes and retreated back into the bedroom. “And that affinity is innately physical.”

“That has been my assumption, yes.” Loki smiled at him. “Your understanding of seidr is far greater than I would have thought. You continue to impress me.”

Tom blushed. “It’s just logical.”

“You do yourself a disservice. The mind of a seidrmadr requires intelligence and intuition as well as natural talent. It is rare in the longer lived races, let alone mortals.”

“I thought magic wasn’t embraced by Asgard?”

“It’s considered cowardly, yes. But only Aesir warriors are held to that standard. Those who would never be warriors - or whose prowess is undeniable - can practice as they wish. Other realms do not hold the same prejudices”

“And you were held to be a warrior.”

“I _am_ a warrior, but my strengths were considered lesser.”

Tom understood the bitterness in Loki’s voice. “They’re idiots.”

Loki snorted. “Things may be different now. So few warriors survived, and Thor has embraced some of the… tolerance seen here on Midgard. I have hope for those males who wish to pursue the craft in the future. And any maids who wish to be warriors.”

“I’m sure he’ll be better than Odin.”

Loki laughed. “He could hardly be worse in that regard.”

They dressed and left the flat a few minutes later. As Tom locked the door, Loki made a small tight gesture with one hand while the other traced along their forms, lightly brushing Tom’s skin as he did. The human shivered at the feel of Loki’s magic, but kept as silent and still as he could.

“There. We shall not be bothered now.”

Tom nodded and lead the way down the street, Loki by his side. They walked past a handful of people, but nobody gave them a second look. In fact, no one gave them a first look. The eyes of the other people on the street just sort of slipped over them. “How does this work? Are we invisible?”

“No. That is certainly possible, but unnecessary. This simply encourages others to not pay us mind. We are an unusual enough sight that it is quite easy; people do not see what they do not expect.”   

“It’s like an S.E.P. field.” Tom grinned and tangled his fingers with Loki’s.

“A what?”

“Somebody Else’s Problem,” he explained. “People see us, but they don’t pay attention because we’re someone else’s problem, not theirs. It’s from a science fiction novel.”

Loki laughed. “Yes, that’s fairly accurate.”

“It’s nice to not have people staring.”

The god frowned. “Your celebrity status makes you a target.”

“I don’t know that I’d say ‘target’. For the most part it’s fine, but sometimes it gets to be a bit much.”

“I will have to look into creating an artifact for you so that you may go unnoticed if I am not here.”

Tom squeezed Loki’s hand. He appreciated the thought, but it also reminded him that Loki wouldn’t necessarily be staying forever. He didn’t want the god to go. Not for any reason. He leaned over kissed Loki’s cheek and grinned at the resulting smile on the other’s face.

Their shopping trip was blissfully unremarkable. Tom had somewhat expected Loki to be completely unfamiliar with human food, but that wasn’t the case. There were a few things he asked about - the sheer volume and variety of packaged foods especially seemed to surprise him - but for the most part he seemed to recognize the items offered at the market. Or if he didn’t, the god covered for it well. In the end, they stuck with basics like meat, eggs, cheese, vegetables and fruits. Tom wondered if Loki had a sweet-tooth like himself, and grabbed some high end chocolate that they could eat or transform into a more elaborate pudding.

Loki seemed relieved when they returned to the flat, though the god had given every indication that he enjoyed seeing Tom’s world. He assisted Tom with making their dinner; his knife skills were amazing. Loki assured him it was an entirely different skill set than fighting with daggers when Tom brought it up. It apparently had far more to do with having to prepare spell ingredients in his younger days and the god’s natural dexterity.

“You mean the media lied to me?”

Loki raised an eyebrow and went back to his chopping. “Your sarcasm falls slightly flat when I do not understand your references, beloved.”

Tom was too stunned by “beloved” to reply properly. “Sorry.”

“There is nothing to apologize for. I am certain it was an excellent jest.”

“It actually wasn’t, but thanks.”

Loki snickered.

They ate supper with little conversation as they were both starving - they should have gone to the market yesterday, but had been too distracted. Goodness knows that home - and all that came with it - was more than preoccupying enough to forget a little thing like shopping.

Tom was aware of a subtle shift in their relationship that had been growing over the course of the day, but he wasn’t sure what to make of it. Loki’s casual usage of a term of endearment was less striking than his hungry attentions of this “morning”. Tom admitted to himself that he was more than half in love with the god, but that had been true even before he’d realized that Loki was real.

He wondered if Loki’s actions and words were an indication that the god felt the same way, or if he was simply committing himself more fully to their pairing. It could go either way, and both were fine. At least Loki didn’t seem like he wanted to leave. It wouldn’t be the first time that Tom had been in a relationship that was primarily physical with a basis of friendship. It wouldn’t even be the first time that he’d been in love with the other person while that love was not returned. Tom fell in love easily; he knew that. A light love that only lasted a few months was better than none, and a one-sided love with a friend was better still.

As long as that friend didn’t go off and get married. Then things got complicated, especially when they were still in each other’s lives.

“Does something trouble you?”

“No.”

Loki raised a skeptical eyebrow. “You do not wish to speak of it.”

Tom sighed. He should have known he couldn’t lie to Loki. Tom could dissemble, and he could distract the god, but not outright lie. “I was thinking about how my friends would react to us.”

“Ah.” Loki took another bite, still looking at Tom. “You fear that they will judge you?”

He shrugged. “Maybe. It’s a complicated situation, explaining who you are and where you came from. After all, you don’t really exist here, and to the extent you do, you’re me.”

Loki nodded. “Do those who you care about know who I really am? Are they familiar with the ‘character’ you portray?”

“Yes.” Everyone that mattered did. If nothing else, they’d seen the films. Chris had acted by his side for years and understood how he felt about the _character_ of Loki, if not the real person. Ben… he didn’t know how Ben would react.

“You would make our relationship public to them despite this?” Loki’s tone was carefully even.

“Of course I would.”

Loki’s smile took his breath away. He leaned across the table to kiss the god, reassure him. The spark of their connection shot through their mouths, and Loki responded with a trickle of seidr pushed through Tom’s lips along with his tongue.

They made it to the couch before all of their clothes were magicked away.

How had this become his life? Tom wasn’t going to complain. Maybe he had gone mad after all. Maybe this was all a fever dream, a phantasy of his own deluded mind. If it was… well, he just didn’t care anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The S.E.P. Field is from _Life, the Universe and Everything_ by Douglas Adams. I have no idea if Tom has read or listened to the series, but it seems pretty likely. He is British after all.


	15. Cairo

 

 

Tom noticed immediately that the air was thick and hot. Not unbearably so, but warmer than England ever got any time but the absolute height of summer. He opened his eyes to see a window. The faint breeze made the heat marginally more tolerable.

 _You are taking control._ Loki's voice was loaded with distaste.

_Too hot?_

_Yes. Much._

Tom laughed quietly. _Can't you magic us cool?_

_Not without difficulty. Do you recognize where we are?_

Tom looked out the window down on to a narrow street. A handful of people milled about below, dark skinned and wearing light colored clothes. It had a familiar feel, unlike their previous excursions. _Egypt, I think._

_We are still on Earth?_

_I think so, yes. Though if I'm right, this isn't the safest part by any stretch._

_Oh?_

_Yes. Let me see if I can verify this._ Tom searched the room and found a formal looking western style jacket. In the interior breast pocket was a slim notecase and a passport. As he expected, the name on the IDs read Jonathan Pine.

 _We're in Cairo, Egypt. 2011,_ he told Loki. _In the middle of a revolution._

_Wonderful._

_I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or serious._

_A little of both,_ Loki admitted. _I am certain I can keep us safe. And there is much chaos to be found in such a place._

_I'm not fond of being shot, just so you know._

Loki laughed. _I know of no-one who is._

_Would we able to pull out yet?_

_Soon enough. Do you wish to leave?_

Tom thought about the possibilities of exploring this city, being in actual peril but with a safety net of being able to leave if necessary. He wondered if they could make a difference to the outcome of Jonathan’s story, if the character could be killed by their actions. _I’d like to explore some. It might be interesting, the heat notwithstanding._

_Very well._

Tom pulled on Pine's pale jacket and headed out of his small flat.

The streets buzzed with a strange energy, like an angry beehive about to erupt.

 _This place is set to explode, beloved. A tiny spark would push it into violence and turmoil._ Loki’s mind voice had a strange intensity to it. It took Tom a minute of pondering, but he realized that Loki wanted - _needed_ in some fundamental way - to provide that point of ignition. He was restraining himself, and in fact pulled back, ceding more control to Tom. That was interesting.

Tom found himself hyper aware of those around them, eyes flicking constantly about. It was because of that vigilance that he noticed the three men following them into an alleyway.

_Loki, if those people attack us, can you deal with them?_

_I can. You would prefer to fight them off rather than to leave your host to deal with them?_

_I’m not wholly certain he could. He’s dangerous, but three against one isn’t the best odds for a mere human._  

Loki snorted in their shared mind. _You simply desire to see me fight._  

_I admit, it has a draw, though I’d rather see it from the outside._

_That would be most dangerous for you._

Tom laughed nervously. _I’d also rather see you fight as yourself, not me. Well, sort of me. Here they come._

Loki slid forward, now in control of the ex-soldier’s body. Their attackers were armed only with knives, not guns. A lone European on his own in a foreign city looked like an easy target, and Tom didn’t walk like the fighter that Pine had been and would be again.

Two of the attackers came up on either side, each going for an arm while the third hung back. Loki seized the one on the right by the wrist, grabbed his knife, and flipped the man over his hip. The attacker’s momentum carried him into a pile of refuse with a wet crack.

The one on the left received a sharp jab to the gut an elbow and punch to the jaw. He stumbled back a step and dropped his knife. Loki stomped on the hilt and the blade flew up into his free hand where he caught it by the grip. Tom felt the god grin.

Now armed with a pair of mismatched knives, Loki dropped his stance as the third attacker rushed them. This one was a better fighter, and avoided the throw that had taken the first one down. The attacker slashed at them, but Loki dodged it easily. A second slash came, poorly timed, and Loki sliced the incoming hand. The man screamed as the knife clattered to the ground, and clutched his wounded hand to his chest.

“Now, don’t you want to rethink this brilliant idea?” Loki asked them. The words came out of his mouth in Arabic, which caused a slight echo to Tom’s perception. It hadn’t occurred to him that Loki might not be speaking English up until now. “Come now.” The god gestured with the blades in his hands. “Shall we dance?”

The three attackers looked at each other, paused, then fled at full speed.

“Ah. Disappointing.” Loki flung the blades at the wall beside them. The cheap metal dug into the wood several inches deep. Loki dusted his hands off on their trousers.

_Wouldn’t it be best to keep a knife just in case?_

_If we had a sheath for it, yes._ Loki pushed Tom back into control of the body. _As it is, a naked blade is too dangerous to carry._

 _Ah._ Tom shifted his shoulders and straightened his cuffs. _Do you feel better now?_

Loki laughed. _Slightly. It was too short a fight._  

_I guess we’ll have to figure out another way of getting rid of your excess energy._

_I can think of a few ways,_ Loki purred.

Tom laughed. _I don’t think Jonathan would appreciate that._

_Pity. When we return home then._

Tom shivered pleasantly. _Now you’re making me want to go home early._

_Good._

Tom smiled to himself. _It seems like a wasted opportunity though. This is a fascinating city. Ancient, by human standards._

_As you wish, beloved._

Tom was grateful that Loki wasn’t upset, but perhaps it wasn’t surprising. They were out to explore, after all.

They walked out of the alley into a broader street. The scent of spices and cooking meat lured him to the left.

 _I can feel the age of this place._ Loki said. _There are stones here that are older than I. And… there is magic, but distant._

That was a little surprising. _Magic? Really?_

 _Oh yes. It was long ago, but it flows beneath the streets like,_ **_with_ ** _the water._

 _Huh._ Tom bargained for a kebab with his limited Arabic and took a large bite before answering. _I’m just a little surprised._

_Humans are perfectly capable of magic, as you know. Your species is simply inclined to change quickly, and you forget how to manipulate what you cannot see._

_But I can feel it._

_You can._ Loki’s voice was full of approval. _So can others. But were you to feel a tingle on your skin with no source, would you not believe that your own mind had created the feeling?_

 _With the way that science is predominant now, yes, that makes sense._ Tom nodded. _I thought I was going mad rather than accept that something magical had happened to me._

_Exactly. Your species has blinded itself._

_Not all of us,_ Tom replied. _There are plenty of mystical traditions that still embrace the idea of a manipulatable power._

_Perhaps there is hope for you yet._

Tom laughed aloud, drawing a curious look from a few passing by. _I’m glad you think so._

_I would teach you to pull power from the world, so that you could manipulate it to your own ends._

_You would?_

_Of course. May I?_ Loki pushed himself forward slightly and Tom allowed him to take over their body. He could feel the god doing _something_ , then head off in a completely different direction than he’d been going. Loki ate the last bite of the kebab and wiped his hands on the handkerchief that was in their pocket as they walked.

_Where are we going?_

_To a source of power._ Loki opened a seemingly random door in one of the ramshackle buildings around them and headed down a flight of stone stairs. _As I said, magic still flows beneath this city._

Loki unerringly went from the bottom of the stairs to what looked like a trap door in the rough stone floor. The smell of water, slightly stagnant but not fetid, drifted up from below. Loki dropped through the hole and landed in a crouch.

 _How are we going to get back up?_ Tom asked.

Loki looked up at the square of light above them. He would have been able to make the jump in _his_ body, but this mortal form would not be able to. _There are other passages out of here. This is an ancient aquifer._  

_I hope so. I’d feel bad if Pine was trapped down here._

Loki stilled, listening. _I believe there is an exit some two-hundred paces to the north._

_Okay, good._

As he sought power he could feel flowing below the city, Loki reflected yet again on how pleasant it was to not be second-guessed by his partner. Tom accepted his expertise. He might ask questions, but it was in the spirit of understanding, not lack of faith in his judgement. That was something that Loki had never had before, and yet another reason to love the mortal.

 _Ah, here._ Loki sat on the rough stone, legs folded in the position he’d seen Tom use, tighter than he would normally sit upon the ground, but he’d found it to be more conducive for the channeling of seidr. _Come forward and feel what I do._

Tom compiled and felt his senses overlap with Loki’s. He was disoriented for a moment, but slowly he realized that Loki was feeling something _extra_. He processed it as part sound, partially a feeling on his skin, in his bones. Like the way he might feel a bass beat, but lighter, and more tangible.

 _Very good, beloved._ Loki’s approval was just as palpable. _Now, let that feeling flow into you, soak into your flesh. Breathe it in with the air._

Breathing it in was easier than letting it absorb through his skin, though he could tell both were effortless for Loki. He drew the breath in, let the energy cycle, then pushed it out again.

 _You are doing very well, but try to keep the power you have received rather than releasing it again. What you are doing now would work to heal minor injuries to your form but would be insufficient fora more major working._ Loki pushed himself forward slightly and took over their breathing. _See._ He inhaled and exhaled, but somehow trapped the energy, straining it out of the air.

_How are you doing that?_

Loki paused. _It is difficult to explain. I am making myself more attractive to the power. It is more inclined to stay with us than to leave. Come forward again and see if you can feel it._

Tom obeyed. After concentrating on it for a while, he could feel a difference. It was like his lungs were _sticky._ There was also something in his throat preventing the energy from leaving.

_It’s like a whale!_

He felt Loki blink in confusion. _Whale?_

 _There are whales that filter tiny creatures out of the water to eat._ Tom explained. _I guess there are no whales on Asgard…_  He projected a slightly cartoony image of the giant sea mammal.

 _No._ Loki sounded amused. _Filtration is an excellent way of looking at it. The same way that your body keeps the gases it requires when you breathe._

They practiced for a little while longer, until Tom got too tired to continue. Loki took over the body entirely and lead them out of the aquifer which emptied out into an abandoned archaeological dig. He took them back to Jonathan’s part of town, up to his flat. By then, Tom was utterly spent.

_Are you well, beloved? Do you need my help to return?_

_I may._ Even thinking was difficult. _Yes._ He felt Loki envelop his mind completely. It was strangely comfortable, like being wrapped in a warm blanket.

They pulled away, Loki cocooned around him. Tom was aware of landing back in his body in a way that he usually wasn’t. Then he realized it wasn’t his body, it was _Loki’s_. He could feel the seidr in the god’s body, rich, hot, thick. He gasped with Loki’s voice, and looked out of Loki’s eyes to see his own body laying in front of them, pressed against them. Tom felt their body respond to that closeness with an intense desire. Loki vanished the Tesseract and shifted them away from Tom’s body. The god rolled it onto its back, and leaned over to kiss it. Tom was pushed back into his body through his lips, _their_ lips. Then he was back in his own form, looking up at Loki with sleepy eyes.

“Rest beloved. As much as I would love to have you now, you need to sleep.”

“I… if you say so.” It was hard to resist the promise of the god’s lust filled eyes, but he was exhausted. “In the morning.”

“As you say, my love, in the morning.” Loki kissed him sweetly, and he felt a pulse of seidr through their lips. “Sleep.” It was a command Tom’s body couldn’t ignore, and he fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is based on _The Night Manager._


	16. Chapter 16

 

Ben stood outside of Tom’s flat, key in his hand, wondering if he could live with himself if he did what he was thinking of doing. His friend was on the continent, so he should be able to snoop around and find out more about whatever had been bothering the younger man. He tried to justify this to himself: Tom was possibly - _probably_ \- in trouble and wasn’t telling him. He had to know his mate was alright, but this was a huge violation of trust. He’d hidden the truth from Tom before; he would do it again - kept doing it, constantly - but this was different. That was justified, this was not. The weight of guilt warred with his anxiety at him friend’s odd behavior. _Has he realized? Is that why he’s been avoiding me?_ He _had_ to know _._

So he unlocked the door and stepped inside.

His eyes took in the sitting room. Everything looked pretty normal. The place was neat, but not excessively so. The overstuffed bookshelves were just as he remembered. The afghan that normally lived on the back of the sofa pooled at one end like it had been pushed off Tom’s legs and left where it lay.

A pair of tea mugs on the breakfast bar caught his attention. It was odd that Tom would have left something out if he was leaving town. There was a small amount of tea left in each cup, one milky like Tom took his, one black. There was something pulling at the “Sherlock” portion of Ben’s mind. You couldn’t play a character who’s life was based on observation and deduction without picking a _few_ things up. Something was off. He thought for a long moment, staring at the cups.

If Tom had left four days ago, the tea should have evaporated more. This was cold, but relatively _fresh_.

He frowned. The idea that Tom might have lied about leaving town cut like a knife.

“Tom? Are you here?”

There was no answer.

Ben poked into Tom’s office space and failed to guess the password on his friend’s computer. The spare bedroom had an unmade bed and a pair of men’s boots on the floor next to the wardrobe. A pile of dark clothing lay on the floor beside the bed. He balked at examining the clothes too closely and ignored the mixed feeling he had at discovering that the guest room was in use. Evidence was more and more suggesting that Tom had someone staying with him and wasn’t away at all. At least the mystery guest wasn’t sharing Tom’s bed. Ben didn’t want to think about how much of a relief that was.

He climbed the stairs with little worry about being heard. If Tom was in the house he would have heard Ben calling to him.

The door to master bedroom was open. That was normal. The azure light coming through the half open doorway was not.

_Turquoise light. High winds blowing his hair. Nausea deep in his belly._

A sudden spike of pain dug into his temple.

_Don’t go in there._

Ben ignored the quiet voice in his head and crept to the door, pushed it open the rest of the way and peaked in.

Long black hair on the pillow.

_What?_

Long black hair beside curling dark blond. Expanses of pale skin.

Two men lay asleep in the bed. Tom’s ultramarine sheets contrasted sharply against both skin and hair. The raven-haired one spooned tight against the back of the blond, his arms wrapped around the other. His muscular back was bared, the duvet pooled around his narrow hips. Four hands cradled the source of the blue light: a twelve centimeter cube wrapped in metal and crystals.

Both men were Tom.

He could see his friend’s face, relaxed in sleep. _Twice._  Ben clutched at his temples as agony stabbed through him. His vision went white.

He stumbled backwards away from the bed, out the door, down the hall, down the stairs, out the front door.

“Fuck fuck fuck.”

He grabbed his mobile and dialed Chris without thinking.

“Ben? Do you know what time it is here?”

“Bloody hell, Chris, I don’t know what to do.”

“What’s going on?” The Australian’s tone softened from irate to concerned.

“I don’t know I don’t know.” Ben cried out in pain as another sharp pain lanced through his brain. “Chris, there’s two of him. I don’t know.”

“Hey, calm down, it’s okay.”

“Noooooo, no it isn’t. There’s something completely mad going on.” He sat heavily on the stairs in front of Tom’s building. “Fuck.”

“Just tell me what’s going on.”

“I… I went to Tom’s flat while he was out of town. Except he wasn’t. He’s there, and there are two of him.”

“What do you mean ‘there are two of him’?”

“Unless he has a twin brother we didn’t know about, and they’re disturbingly close, there are two Toms.”

“What happened, Ben?” Chris’s voice was calm.

“I went upstairs and there was this blue light coming out of his bedroom, so I went in.”

“Uh huh.”

“And they were there in the bed. One Tom looking normal, the other with long black hair.”

“Long black hair?” Chris asked with a curiously flat voice.

“Yes.”

“You’re sure.”

“Yes, of course.” Did Chris think he was an idiot?

“Like when he’s playing Loki?”

 _Oh._ “Fuck. Yes.”

“You said there was a blue light? Where was it coming from?” Chris’s tone was warry now.

“There was a box wrapped in wires and crystals. They were holding it.”

“A cube?”

“Fuck.”

“A glowing blue _cube_?”

Ben’s eyes went wide. “No. That is not fucking possible.”

“You’re telling me that it looked like the Tesseract? Is that what you’re telling me?”

“Yes.”

Ben heard a deep breath through the speaker. “You need to go back in there.”

“No.”

“Ben, listen. Go back and take a photo. Send it to me.”

“No!”

Chris sighed. “The only way we're going to know what's going on is if you have proof. If you don't go back and do this, you will wonder for the rest of your life what the fuck was going on. You'll think you imagined the whole thing.”

Ben cried out in pain as his vision went black. “Ah, my _head_.”

“Just do it.”

“Fine. - Aaah! - Fine, I'll do it.”

“I'll call you back once I get the photo, okay?”

“Okay.”

Ben forced himself to stand. Open the door. Head upstairs.

They were still there. Still asleep. Still two.

With shaking hands, he took a handful of pictures. Tried not to focus on how mad this was. Tried not to focus on how beautiful they were. How _intimate_ this was. How incredibly guilty he felt.

He went back outside and emailed the three best photos to Chris. He sat on the stoop and waited.

He answered his mobile before the first ring was through.

“Fuck.” Chris’s voice was shaking.

“Yeah.”

“I mean… fuck.”

“What the hell is going on?” Ben wailed.

“I don't know. It's… that's the fucking Tesseract. That's _Loki."_

“That's what it looks like.”

“Fuck.” Chris breathed out the curse like it was a lifeline to sanity.  

“And they're naked.”

“Well, shirtless.”

“I'm pretty sure they're naked, Chris.”

“To be frank, I'm less concerned about who Tom is getting naked with than the fact that the world has gone fucking mental.”

Ben laughed, an edge of hysteria creeping in. “When you put it like that…”

“What the fuck. Okay. What do we do?”

“What _can_ we do?” Ben sprang to his feet. “I mean, are we in danger? Is L... Loki going to hurt Tom? They seemed pretty…”

“Intimate.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah.” Chris sounded resigned.

“There's nothing we can do. I mean, not now. I'll have to talk to him, I guess.”

“And tell him you snuck into his apartment and took pictures of him asleep. Naked.”

Ben let out another peal of nervous laughter. “He’s sleeping with a possibly psychopathic murdering god from another dimension, I don’t think unlawful entry is going to phase him.” 

“I’d be creeped out if my best mate did that.”

“Your best mate is sleeping with a fictional alien supervillain.”

Chris sighed. “He’s going to be seriously agro.”

“Do you have a better idea?”

Silence.

“No.”

Ben burst out laughing. He had a hard time stopping. “At least we know what was wrong with him now.”

“I guess we do.”

“Thank you Chris. You were right.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’ll let you know what happens.”

“Be careful, yeah?”

“As careful as I can.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Renee_Vej predicted this basically when Ben gets his key and was so very right. But how could I not?


	17. Chapter 17

 

Tom had gotten used to the sensation of falling back into his body, but he was less used to the feel of a chaos god against his skin, despite that it had happened far more often. Waking up together was wonderful. Was it so wrong to revel in the feel of cool skin and warm magic flowing through him? The way that Loki made him feel cherished, loved, _safe_ was intoxicating. He’d do anything to keep Loki here with him.

The magician shifted against his back, awake and aware. Loki wrapped his arms around Tom’s chest and burrowed his face into the mortal’s neck. The god place a small, chaste kiss on Tom’s pulse which tingled with magic and made him shudder. Taking the long expanse of neck Tom offered him as the invitation it was, Loki bit down gently on the spot where shoulder and neck met. Tom gasped.

“Good morning.” The god’s voice purred in his ear.

“Is it morning?”

“I’ve no idea.” Loki kissed the mortal’s neck. “And I do not care.” His hands wandered over Tom’s chest and stomach, teasing with light touches, making the human shiver with delight. “Do you?”

“No.” Tom’s voice hitched and Loki’s hands drifted lower. “No, not at all.”

“Good.”

o0o

After a long languorous shower, relaxed from the heat and the “morning’s” physical pleasures, Tom decided it was time to deal with reality. Loki was sprawled temptingly over the bed reading one of Tom’s books. The god’s hair had been left to dry naturally and curled over his shoulders. It was difficult for Tom to pull his attention away from the long lean form, but he’d best check his messages.

_Phone me when you wake up._

The text was from Ben. Tom froze.

“Tom?”

His eyes flicked to Loki. The god was looking at him with a small concerned frown. “Would you be able to tell if someone had been in the flat?”

The god frowned. “I have set wards against anything dangerous coming into your home.”

“But someone who wouldn’t be considered dangerous? Someone who would normally be allowed?”

“It would not do to prevent your friends from entering.”

“But can you tell?”

The god straightened up and closed his eyes. He whispered under his breath and made a few gestures with his long fingers. His eyes flew open a moment later. “Yes. Someone was here while we were away.”

“Shit.” He sat on the bed, coming down hard. “This is bad.”

“Who was here?” Loki’s voice was dangerous.

“Ben.”

“Dr. Strange’s actor?”

“Yes.”

“I'm surprised he was able to.” Loki’s voice cooled from angry to curious almost instantly.

“Why?”

“It’s likely that Strange left some sort of deterrent in his mind to keep him from discovering what happened to the pair of you.”

“I could be wrong, but it seems like it didn’t work.” Tom handed Loki his mobile. “The message was sent at 16:03. He would have to have _known_ that I… we were asleep.”

“Will you ‘phone’ him?”

Tom sighed. “I think I have to.”

“I can remove his memories if necessary.”

“I hope it doesn’t come to that.”

Loki shrugged. It made no difference to him as long as Tom was safe. “I will do whatever you wish in this regard.” That was only a bit of a lie, and it was what his lover wanted to hear. Tom smiled at him, warming Loki down to his toes. He returned the smile and - for Tom’s sake -  appeared to turn his attention back to the book in his hands. In reality he was keeping a close watch on his mortal.

Tom’s hand hovered over his mobile as he chewed at his lower lip. Finally he tapped the screen  and held it up to his ear. It was easy for Loki enhance his hearing so that he could follow both sides of the conversation without appearing to. The god kept his eyes on the book.

“Tom.” The chill in the other mortal’s voice made Loki immediately wary.

“You wanted me to phone?”

“I… yes. Can we talk?”

“We are talking, darling.”

The god’s fingers tightened on the leather of the book cover.

“I mean, in person. May I come over?”

Tom’s voice sounded tight and angry. “I was under the impression you didn’t care about my permission for that."

Loki smiled, wicked and pleased. He could almost hear the mortal wince on the other end of the phone.

“Tom…”

“No Ben, what the fuck? What the bloody hell were you thinking?”

“Tom please. Just… can we talk? I need to be sure you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.”

“How can you be fine with _that_ in your bed?”

Loki shut the book with a snap.

“No. No, you do _not_ get to do that.” Tom’s voice took on a deep, dangerous quality that Loki had never heard before. “You do _not_ get to insult him. You have no idea what the fuck is going on and you’re lucky I’m even _talking_ to you.”

The god rose to his feet and touched his mortal’s shoulder. When Tom didn’t shy away, Loki wrapped himself against his lover’s back, arms around his waist and chest. Tom gripped Loki’s arm with his free hand, hard enough that it would have hurt a mortal. Loki barely noticed.

“I don’t even know if I _am_ talking to you.”

Loki hissed into Tom’s hair while Tom grit his teeth at Ben’s response.

“Fine,” Tom bit off.

“Fine?”

“You can meet him.”

There was an audible gulp over the line. “I’ll be over shortly.”

“I am not happy with you.”

“I _did_ get that.”

“Good. Keep it in mind.” Tom jabbed an angry finger at the mobile and tossed the offending instrument on the bed. He melted back into Loki’s embrace and let out a long breath.

“Well done, beloved.” Loki kissed the human’s neck. “What shall we do to prepare for your friend’s arrival?”

“Put clothes on?”

Loki laughed. “But it would be so entertaining to see his face.”

Tom snickered. “I know, but he does have the ability to make our lives difficult. We should at least make an effort.”

“If you insist.” The god saluted the nape of Tom’s neck as he pulled away. “Shall I be terribly impressive and wear armor?”

“Given that he sounded utterly terrified of you, perhaps not.”

Loki laughed, dark and _slightly_ evil. “As you wish.”

He dove into the walk-in wardrobe that he and Tom shared and found some of the dark clothing he preferred. The mortal was beside him in a moment and picked out items that starkly contrasted with the god’s. Sky blue shirt and jeans which made him look pure and innocent to Loki’s dark and brooding. The god was charmed, but curious about the impression that his mortal was trying to put forward.

A knock at the door below prompted Tom to rush out of their bedroom still barefoot.

Loki hung back for a moment, then padded down the stairs on stealthy feet. He remained in the shadows by the stairs, listening.

Loki knew little about the ways of mortals, for all that he had observed them for centuries. He did know that he cared very deeply for this particular mortal, and that whatever the god was about to hear might affect Tom greatley, perhaps for the rest of his life. Loki might be about to witness great pain for his mortal, and he wondered, as he listened with curiosity and trepidation, how he was going to react.

“You got here quickly.” Tom’s voice was ice.

“Yes, well.”

Loki heard Tom sigh heavily. “You might as well sit down.”

“Thank you.”

It was odd to hear Dr. Strange’s voice with Tom’s accent. Loki had heard it before - in a rather entertaining and enlightening conversation with Ben while he himself had been inhabiting Tom’s body - but since he had spent far more time in the magician’s presence than his now-former host’s, it was still striking. What was most noteworthy was that said voice sounded completely cowed. Tom had a tremendous amount of power over his friend. Loki wondered if either man realized it.

After a long silence, Tom spoke. “Do you have anything you want to say to me?” His mortal’s voice was sharp. It reminded Loki of another voice. His own.

“I… I’m sorry. I was worried about you. I still am.”

“Do I look like I need you to be worried about me?”

“I don’t know.” There was a pause. “Is it really him? The same Loki you’ve been playing?”

“Yes.”

“I can’t believe you’d...”

Tom interrupted. “Shut up. You don’t get to talk about him. You don’t, _can’t_ , understand. This is good, Ben. This is so good, and you…” He took a deep breath. “You broke into my home. You went into my bedroom while I was _sleeping_. I can’t even begin to describe how furious I am. How _violating_ that is.”

“You were lying to me!”

“Are you certain you want to play that card?” Tom snapped.

“I…”

“No, you do not get to be upset at me for lying.” Tom took another deep breath and let it out slowly, calming himself. Keeping himself from hurting his lying friend more. “For one thing, you had no reason to think that I was telling you anything but the truth.”

“You’re a terrible liar, Tom. I knew something was wrong. I was just trying to find out what.”

“By breaking into my home.”

“This is not all on me. You’re… you’re _fucking_ a dangerous alien war criminal.”

“And what part of that bothers you more.” Loki came into the room before Tom could answer. “That I am here, or that he is fucking _me?”_

Loki was amused by Tom’s friend’s double take, how frightened Ben seemed to be by the god’s slow smile. Ben’s eyes frantically went between the two other men, disbelief plain on his face.

“I… I don’t know what you mean.”

Loki chuckled. “You should know better than to lie to me.” He went to stand by Tom, body angled in towards his mortal, but not touching him. If either reached out, even a little, they would make contact; it was a visible show of possession, but also equality. “I can see your truths as though they were written on your countenance.”

“Loki, be nice,” Tom muttered.

“Be nice? Be _nice_ _?_ This man entered your home uninvited and _spied_ on us. I feel no need to be nice _._ I will respect your friendship for him, but do not ask me to restrain my words when he has done nothing but violate your trust.”

Tom winced.  Loki wasn’t sure if it was at his snap of temper or Ben’s gutted expression.

“Tom, why do you… how can you _trust_ him?” Ben stood now and was reaching out a hand towards them. “You know how dangerous he is.”

“Because I know him!” The other two jumped at Tom’s shout. “He is a part of me.”

“But you _know_. After everything he’s done…”

“But nothing. Can’t you see? This is better. This will make everything better.”

As they spoke, it dawned on Loki that there was another conversation going on here that he had no part in. He looked sharply between the two humans, who glared at one another and avoided his gaze. “What do you mean, ‘this will make everything better’?”

Tom winced. Ben uttered a tiny, “oh,” then snapped his mouth shut.

“Tom?”   _Beloved?_

“I…”

“As long as the Tesseract is here, Thanos can’t get it.” Ben’s voice was oddly calm as he addressed Loki. “As long as you’re _here_ , your universe is safe.” He suddenly doubled over in pain, clutching at his temples. “Ah! My head.”

Loki didn’t care about the mortal’s pain. Likely it was Strange’s work being ripped apart by the recognition of what was happening. That was irrelevant. “Is that true? Is that why you wanted me here?”

Tom flinched.  

Rage spiked in Loki’s chest into an inferno of fury, how _dare_ Tom lie to the God of Lies. Almost immediately, a wave of despair rose inside of him and extinguished his anger. _Of course._ “You do not want me.” Loki stated in a flat voice. “You merely wish to save the Nine Realms from chaos. To play the hero _._ ” He spit the last word out with a sneer.

“That’s not true, I… I do want you. I can’t help myself. I can’t stop wanting you, loving you.” Loki’s mortal - _not really his_ \- spoke with a passion too true to be anything but a lie.

Loki’s shoulders fell. He covered his face with his hands and hair to hide the pain he couldn’t will away. A dozen strange reactions and nearly-spoken words flooded back to him. “I was blind. It was there from the beginning. I should have known that you did not actually want me in your life. Why would you?”

Tom wrapped his arms around Loki’s unresponsive torso and spoke into his neck. “Loki, that isn’t true. I would have done anything to get you here with me. To stay with me. I’m not a hero. The whole Tesseract thing is just a bonus; I get to feel good about being so selfish.”

Loki laughed, but it was bitter. “You are kind to a fault. How can you stand being with me?

“I love you. I always have.”

It was a lie. It had to be. “How can I trust that?”

“Think about it from your own perspective. What would Loki do?”

“Do you truly believe that I would _not_ stoop to sexually involving myself with someone for the sake of my plans? Seduction is a weapon, mortal.”

He tried not to see the pain in Tom’s eyes. More hateful, hurtful words formed on his tongue. _If you believe I have never fucked my way to power, whored myself out for favor and prestige, you are_ ** _wrong._** But the words stuck in his throat. Despite everything, he couldn’t stand for Tom to think less of him.

“You would rather believe that I… I seduced you? For the sake a universe I didn’t even know was real a fortnight ago?”

“You are not _me,_ ” Loki snapped. “You are a good man, not a monster.”

Tom kissed his cheek. “I’m a selfish git who doesn’t want to let go of the best thing in his life.”

Loki shook his head and pulled away. “You lied to me.” His own voice sounded broken to his ears. Shameful.

“Loki…” Tom’s hand brushed his arm. A spark leapt between them. The spark that connected them. “I didn’t lie. I just had a… a tertiary motivation.”

“The first two being?”

“I wanted to spend time with you and see the universe. You know that.”

“Do I?”

“I’m sorry.” Tom tugged on Loki’s arm and the god reluctantly allowed the embrace. “I didn’t tell you because I was worried about revealing anything about your future. I thought it would be dangerous. None of that changes how I feel about you.”

“Things fall poorly in your films then.”

“You knew that Thanos would come eventually. That he’d find the Tesseract. And you.”

“I…” Loki felt at a loss. He knew that Tom was right, but it still stung. 

Ben cleared his throat loudly. Tom jumped, having apparently forgotten that the other human was there. “He’s been protecting you this whole time,” Ben said. “He didn’t have to do that." 

Loki glared at the mortal and was satisfied to see him pale. At least someone feared his wrath.

“Not helping, Ben.”

“No, I can’t just… Look, I’ve seen you in a lot of relationships, and I know what it looks like when you’re… when you’re in...” Ben closed his eyes, only to look at Loki a moment later. “He’s not lying.”

For some reason  Loki found this strangely comforting. The other human was terrified of him, wanted Tom for himself, and had known his mortal - _his mortal -_ for many years by the reckoning of their short lives. If Ben not only believed that Tom loved him, but was willing to say so, well, there might be truth to it.

Or perhaps it was some kind of game.

“Why do you say this? Why would you do anything but drive a wedge between us?”

Ben sighed deeply and looked down at the floor. “I want Tom to be happy.”

Tom made a tiny, strangled sound in the back of his throat so quiet Loki barely heard it. His hands tightened on Loki’s back and he pressed himself into the god. He whispered into his hair, “please, Loki.” 

“You are both fools.” Loki brought his arms up to encircle the human pressed against him. “I should kill the pair of you.” He spoke the threat, because he was who he was, but it had no heat.

Tom laughed and squeezed Loki with all his strength. Ben just stared at them, wide eyed and trembling.

“What do you intend?” Loki asked Tom’s terrified friend.

“Me? Nothing.” At the god’s frown, Ben continued. “I just want to be sure that Tom’s safe.” He made eye contact with Tom. “That’s all I wanted. Can you understand that?” Slowly, Tom nodded. Ben looked back to Loki. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t take over the world, while you're at it.” It was a poor attempt at a joke, but Loki felt the corner of his mouth twitch.

“It might be better for your realm if I did,” he retorted. He had no intentions of subjugating this parallel Midgard, of course. After all, he had promised Tom that he wouldn't.

“Probably,” Ben agreed to Loki’s surprise. “I don’t think the world would cope well with a magical gay dictator though.”

“Pansexual god-king, please, darling,” Tom corrected abscently, his voice muffled slightly by Loki’s shoulder.  

Ben looked at him, exasperated. “And how is that better?”

Tom shrugged. “It’s more accurate. It would make the army happier as well, I suspect.”  

“The army,” Ben asked flatly.

Loki laughed. For a moment, his mind filled with dreams of his beautiful mortal on a throne by his side. Tom would make a fitting consort; his compassion would be an excellent foil to Loki’s own ruthlessness. He realized he’d completely forgiven Tom without a second thought. “I have no intention of conquering your realm with battalions of fangirls, despite how amusing that would be.”

“Oh, that army.” Ben had settled down in the last few minutes. He looked less like a horse about to bolt, but still stared at the god with wide, uncertain eyes. “You’re not what I expected.”

Loki bared his teeth in a parody of a smile designed to instill fear. It appeared to work; Ben looked terrified. 

“Loki.” Tom’s voice was serene.

The god relaxed a fraction. “What did you anticipate, mortal?” he said to Ben. "To be murdered on sight?”

“Something like that, yes.”

“Then you are braver than I would have expected. Or your affection for Tom makes you a fool.” Loki suspected the latter.

Ben looked away.

Loki wanted to do something about this tension between his mortal and Ben, cause it to bubble over into chaos so that it might resolve. But… that could turn out very poorly for himself. He didn’t know their history, though he had his theories. He gritted his teeth and said nothing.

“Are you satisfied?” Tom asked, a harsh edge to his voice.

Ben looked back at them, eyes still flitting between the two. “I suppose so. Although… I do have a question.” 

Tom nodded, a brief jerk of the head.

“What were you doing with the Tesseract earlier? When you were ‘sleeping’.”

“Oh.” Tom looked to Loki. “Could you explain it, please?”

“We are using the Space Stone to travel to other realms. Projecting our essences out across universes.” He watched Ben’s face closely and saw a wince of pain. _Interesting_. “Do you recall this happening before?”

“I… what? No. I remember… I remember light, but it wasn’t the same color as… as the Tesseract.” Ben shook his head violently. “Wind. Feeling ill.”

“He remembers what happened?” Tom asked Loki.

Loki shook his head. “No, but Strange’s work is crumbling.”

“Strange? He’s real too?”

“Of course he is,” Tom scoffed. “They’re all real. You know that or you wouldn’t have brought up Thanos.”

“Pardon me, but it’s a little different when it’s _my_ character.”

Tom laughed. It was harsh and a bit bitter. “Are you being serious?”

Ben had the grace to blush. “I admit, that sounded better in my head.”

Loki grinned. “It all fairness, beloved, he did have blocks in his mind preventing him from realizing what was going on.”

Ben glared at Loki. “Are you responsible for that?”

“Weren’t you listening?” Tom snapped. “Doctor Strange altered your memories, not Loki.”

Loki ran his hand down Tom’s back in a pattern intended to soothe his agitated mortal. He wasn’t sure why Tom was so upset, though it was clearly at least in part in Loki’s defense.

Ben continued to scowl at Loki, who smiled easily.  

“If I had erased your memories, I would have done a better job of it.”

Tom laughed. “God I love you,” he whispered into Loki’s ear.

Loki felt the truth of Tom’s words and suppressed the urge to purr. He knew that his responding smile unnerved Ben even more. Loki’s smile wasn’t for him, it was for Tom, but oh Ben _wanted_ it to be for himself. _Ahhhh._

“Tom, a moment in private?”

The actor looked surprised, but allowed Loki to pull him into his study and close the door.

Tom looked at him expectantly.

“Are there any realms you shared with him?”

“What?”

“Have you appeared in any other films with your friend other than my own?”

“Just one. We were both in another series, but not at the same time. Why?”

“I think we should take him with us.”

Tom’s eyes went huge. “You’re serious?”

Loki grinned. “Yes.”

“You’ve got something up your sleeve.”

“When do I not?”

Tom laughed. “Fair enough.”

Loki thought for a long moment. “If there is only one other, it must be the same universe where I was with Strange, and I would not take you there if I could help it.”

“Where was that?”

“If I recall correctly, Strange said that it was during a war of the last century.”

“Ah yes, _War Horse._ ” Tom rubbed his chin pensively. “It’s a pity my character dies before his appears in _The Hollow Crown_.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “That was one of places you wanted to go most, yes?”

“Yes.”

“I may be able to... adjust for that. If you both exist in space, but not time…”

Tom’s eyes lit up. “You can still do it?”

“I may. In fact, it might be easier to achieve with two anchor points, though it will be more difficult a working.”

“But… if I’m understanding correctly, aiming for the right universe will be more accurate?”

Loki nodded. “That is the case.”

Tom bounced as he leaned in to kiss Loki. “Perfect. You’re wonderful.”

The god grinned at his mortal’s enthusiasm. “Do keep in mind that this is not an assurance. It may be possible to end up in a realm from your future.”

“Still worth a try. And I think he’d like to see what we’ve been going on about.”

Loki nodded. “Would you care to invite him?”

Tom nodded and bounced out the door. Loki smiled fondly and followed.

Ben was picking at the edge of the afghan which lay on the couch as they re-entered. He had the look of a prisoner awaiting execution as he looked up at them, and Tom’s exuberance threw him for a loop.

“Come with us.”

“What?” Ben’s mouth dropped open.

“Come with us,” Tom repeated. “Don’t look so gobsmacked. Come see another world that we’ve acted in. It’s amazing Ben.”

“Why would you…” he looked between the pair. “Why would you offer that?”

“I believe it will allow you to understand better,” Loki lied smoothly. “And Tom wishes it.”

“Do you always do what Tom wants?”

Loki grinned, sharklike. “Be grateful that I do.”

Ben blanched and high spots of color appeared on his cheeks. “I am.” He looked at Tom. “How is he a thousand times scarier than you?”

The other actor shrugged. “Perhaps because he could kill you without moving?”

Ben shivered and shook his head. “I don’t think that’s it. You care, he doesn’t.”

“I care deeply, just about very… particular things. I think you will find I am not without passion.”

Ben swallowed hard. Loki grinned.

Tom nudged Loki’s arm with his elbow, and the god looked to his mortal. Tom had a quizzical expression, one eyebrow cocked in question. Loki smiled easily in response, and got a clear _“what the fuck are you up to?”_ look back. He leaned in and kissed Tom’s temple and whispered, “trust me,” against the mortal’s skin.

Ben continued to shift in his seat. “I need to think about this.”

“Of course,” Loki replied in a silky tone.

“It’s amazing. You should really come with us.”

Ben nodded, but it was a jerky, wooden motion. “I just… I’ll phone, or text, alright?” He stumbled towards the door, grabbing his jacket and pulling it on with unthinking, automatic motions.

“Okay,” Tom replied as the door swung shut behind Ben. He turned to Loki. “What was that about?”

“I have a theory which I wish to test, and if it gets you to a realm you wish as well, that is all to the good.”

“Please don’t fuck with my friend.”

“What if he wishes me to?”

Tom’s eyes grew wide. “You think he…”

“He wishes to have the darkest part of you, which is _me_.” Loki stroked Tom’s hair with gentle fingers. “He practically screams it.”

“He’s married, Loki.”

“And?”

“So… so he can’t.”

“Ah. Marriage is considered an exclusive arrangement?”

Tom choked. “Yes.”

This explained so many things. “It is different on Asgard.” Loki shrugged. “When you live for thousands of years, staying with one partner to the exclusion of all others is... unusual. That one’s spouse would take lovers is a given and accepted so long as children do not result from other pairings.”

“Monogamy just... isn’t a thing?”

“It can be, but it is not assumed,” Loki replied, amused by his mortal’s stunned reaction.

“I’m not sure how I feel about that.”

Loki kissed Tom, just a gentle press of lips. “I will do nothing that makes you uncomfortable, beloved. Everything can be… negotiated. I am a selfish creature, and understand the desire to have things to myself.”

“It’s just...” Tom laid his head on Loki’s shoulder. “I’ve never looked at it like that.”  

“We come from vastly different cultures. I can understand that with such short lifespans that - ” Loki’s voice hitched, and he held Tom as tightly as he dared, “ - that you would wish to spend as much time with one person as you could.”

Tom hummed. “It’s not like it always works. My… my parents divorced when I was a child. Most of my _friends_ seem to have stable marriages, but… I don’t know.”

“Being bound to a person does not eliminate the desire for others.”

“Are you trying to tell me something here?” Tom’s voice was carefully blank.

Loki squeezed him close. “Beloved, I would be blind to not see that your friend is quite handsome, and that you think so as well. There is no shame in that.”

Tom’s laugh came out a little broken. “Actually, there is.”

“Not for me, and _I_ do not hold _you_ to Earth’s standards.” Loki kissed Tom’s hair. “I did not realize that your society worked in this fashion, though it does explain a great many things. Just know that I am happy to do whatever you wish in this regard.”

“Okay.” Tom took a deep breath. “I need to think about it.”

“Of course.” Loki ran his hand down the human’s back in long, slow strokes. He cast about for something else to discuss. “Do you wish to explore your ability to manipulate seidr further? Build on what we did in Egypt?”

Tom smiled. “That sounds perfect. I don't want to leave again before Ben gets back to us.”

“Very well, let us experiment.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter would be notably different if I wrote it now...


	18. Chapter 18

 

Ben sat on his bed, staring blankly at the wall, his mobile held in loose fingers. He had no idea what to say to Chris. No idea if he would take Tom and Loki up on their offer. He _really_ wasn’t sure what that offer might actually entail…

After a quick calculation to make sure that it wasn’t the middle of the night in Australia, he phoned Chris.

“Hey, you’re alive.”

Ben laughed. “Yup, no murder today.”

“How did it go? Thanks for texting, by the way.”

“Well, if I did disappear, I wanted to be sure someone knew what happened.”

“I don’t know what I could’ve done about it, but yeah, I gotcha.” Chris paused. “So?”

“Loki’s bloody terrifying, but Tom has him wrapped around his little finger. It’s… odd.”

“Huh.”

“I think Tom’s… he’s safe. Probably safer now than ever. He has a literal god taking care of him.”

“You think Loki really cares about him?”

Ben hummed in agreement. “They had - I guess you’d call it a row - while I was there. Loki thought that Tom had lied to him about something and he looked utterly gutted. Not ‘I’ll kill you for this’ upset, but ‘I’ll throw myself off a bridge’ upset.” Ben sighed. “I think they’re in love with each other.”

“Wow. I mean… fuck.”

“You’re telling me.”

“But Tom’s fine, right?”

“He seems to be. He actually seems… happy.”

“He really fancies Loki?” Chris sounded surprised.

“He has some ulterior motives, but yeah.”

“Like what?”

“Apparently they’ve been using the Tesseract to… to go on holiday. Going to other dimensions where they exist, somehow. I didn’t get a good explanation.” Ben rubbed at his temple, trying to dissuade the headache that was threatening. “They want me to go with them.”

“You what?”

“Tom invited me to go with them on one of their Tesseract holidays.”

“Are you going to?”

“I don’t know. Jesus, Chris, this is fucking insane, but they were acting so _normal_. Like any couple.” Ben took a deep breath. “And then Loki casually mentions magic, or killing people, or taking over the world. And you look at them and it’s… they’re the _same person_ , but not really.”

“So Loki acts like Tom in character?”

“Not entirely. I mean, Loki in the films doesn’t seem to have a sex drive; this one certainly does. He might be a bit more pleasant to be around - he didn’t try to kill me after all - but yup, pretty much the same.”

“That sounds… hard.”

Ben sighed. “Very.”

“You alright?”

“I… I don’t know. I need to process everything. I wish Sophie were here. Not that I’d know how to explain all this to her, it’s just…”

“Yeah.”

Ben doubted that Chris actually understood, but that was a conversation that he wasn’t willing to have with anyone. “I’ll let you know if I decide to go. I’ll text again.”

“Cheers. Not that I could actually do anything, but…”

“Just knowing what’s going on helps.”

“Yeah, it does.”

“Do you think I should go?” Ben asked before Chris could hang up.

“I… If it were me? I’d go. I have a feeling that Loki would hate me - since I look like his brother and everything - but I’d still go.”

“I don’t think he likes me much. Honestly I don’t think he really likes anyone other than Tom.”

“But Tom likes you, so that should keep you safe, yeah?”

“I’m not sure how Tom feels about me at the moment.”

“He still spewin’ over the whole sneaking in while he was sleeping thing?”

Ben scoffed. “Amongst other things.”

“Like what?”

“You don’t want to know.”

“I… right.”

Not for the first time, Ben wondered how much Tom had told Chris about his and Ben’s relationship. Enough that Chris chose to dropped the subject, it seemed.

“I’ll let you know what I decide.”

“Thanks. And thanks for letting me know what’s going on.”

Ben wondered for a moment if the fact that Chris was on the other side of the world made this whole situation easier to deal with, or harder. “Of course. We’ll talk soon.”

“Right. Later.”

Ben hung up and stared at his mobile again. He pulled up his text chain with Tom. His last message, a demand. _Phone_ _me when you wake up._ How much had changed since he sent that? His whole world had shifted. What was one more shift?

He typed a message into the mobile, then stared at it for a long moment. He nearly deleted it. Twice. Then he closed his eyes and took a breath. He had to make this decision, and he had to do it now. No turning back.

 _I’ll do it._ He pressed send with a shaking finger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've officially finished this story! I've been struggling with Chapter 20 for like, six weeks, but it's done! I'll be keeping my schedule, since my beta has a life too.


	19. Chapter 19

 

“So, can you tell me about our potential host?” Loki asked over breakfast. “What is he like?”

“Knowing that will help anchor us?”

“Indeed. The greater my understanding, the greater the affinity.”

Tom set his tea mug down and rubbed at his lower lip with a long finger. “I think affinity won’t be an issue. Hal, as a younger man, well, he reminds me a lot of you.”

“Oh?” Loki sipped his tea.

“Yeah, it was actually intensional on our part, though I don’t know how that actually translates…”

“It matters not, beloved. Just explain.”

Tom nodded. “He’s Prince of Wales, crown prince, but his father doesn’t think he’s ready for the crown. His father unfavorably compares him to a cousin, vocally wishing that Hal could be more like him. He’s… reckless, falls in with the wrong crowd, would rather play tricks on his friends than rule, or even think about ruling. But he desperately wants his father’s approval.”

Loki allowed his lip to curl slightly. “Does he receive it?”

“Eventually. Once he takes on the responsibility of the throne. Of course, his father dies shortly thereafter.”

Loki huffed a quiet laugh. “We should all be so lucky.”

Tom smiled wryly and leaned over to kiss Loki’s temple. “He was great fun to play.”

Loki’s eyes danced. “More fun than myself?”

“I wouldn’t say that. Just different. Fewer special effects, more sword work.”

Loki visibly perked up. “You can fight?”

“I can _look_ like I can fight,” Tom corrected. “I’m not sure how well that translates to actual fighting.”

“I would love to spar with you at some point.”

“You’d kick my arse.”

“That’s hardly the point.” Loki waved a dismissive had. “It would be... fun.”

“If you’d like.” A knock at the door interrupted Tom’s reply. “That’s probably Ben.”

Loki closed his eyes. “It is.”

Tom headed over to let their guest in.

Tom opened the door. Ben leaned on the doorframe, dark circles under his eyes. “Hey.”

“Come in. Have some tea.”

Ben laughed. “Tea sounds so _normal_.” He hung his coat up on its usual hook and walked through the sitting room. He nodded to Loki, tugging at his cuffs.

“My life isn’t complete madness, you know.” Tom handed him a mug. “We still eat breakfast and have tea.”

Loki smiled at the exchange and sipped from his own mug.

“Well, I’m glad you can handle it.” Ben sat heavily on one of the bar stools, carefully away from the god. “I hardly slept.”

“You should eat, then,” Loki said. “You will require the energy.”

“I had breakfast.”

“You should consume more than your usual want, since you are short on sleep.”

Ben sighed. “If you insist.”

“Protein?” Tom asked, opening up the fridge.

Loki nodded. “Indeed. Well remembered.”

“There’s bacon left over from breakfast, will that work for you?”

Ben nodded. “Bacon sandwich sounds good.”

Tom set a couple of slices of bread to toast. “Do you want anything, love?”

“Perhaps more tea?” Tom came over to take his mug and retreated to the kitchen proper again.

Ben drank his cuppa and shook his head.

“You have something to say, mortal?”

Ben paled at Loki’s glare. “You’re just so… domestic.”

Loki and Tom both laughed, Loki’s a dark chuckle to Tom’s lighter laugh.

“And that’s extremely disconcerting,”

Tom raised an eyebrow. “That we _don’t_ laugh the same?”

Ben shook his head. “I can’t explain it.”

“It would be well if you could cease thinking of us as being the same person. We are not,” Loki said.  

“If Tom were in costume, it would be almost impossible to tell you apart.”

“That is as may be, but you would not think of twins as being the same person, and we are further distant than that.”

Tom handed Loki his tea, slid into his arms, and kissed the god’s temple. “Believe it or not, this is strange for me, too,” Tom said to Ben. “If you think of Loki and I as separate people, it makes the whole thing look less...creepy.”

“Better than brothers, I suppose.” Ben shrugged and sipped his tea. Loki burst out laughing and Tom turned red. “What did I say?”

“I take it you did not enlighten him of my last long term relationship?”

“Ah, no, I didn’t.” Tom broke away and went back into the kitchen.  

“Oh.” Ben blushed.

“Don’t tell Chris.” Tom shouted from the depths of the kitchen.

“Oh god.” Ben rested his head in his hands. “No, I won’t.”

Loki chuckled, reveling in the mortals’ discomfort.

Tom returned and handed Ben his sandwich. “You did that on purpose,” he accused Loki with a fond smile.

Loki’s eyes widened and he placed both hands on his chest. “I? Never. How could I possibly have predicted what your friend would say?”

Tom narrowed his eyes at the god. “I have faith in your deviousness.”

Loki grinned. “You say the sweetest things.”

Tom laughed. “You’re incorrigible.”

“You are taking note of this after how long?”

“Eight years?”

“Eight years or eight days, my intractable nature should be obvious.” Loki’s reply was flippant, but for the first time he seriously considered the near decade of time that Tom had spent portraying him as something that might actually mean something. A simple affinity between dimensional twins didn’t explain their closeness. He wished that the time hadn’t been so one-sided. Loki smiled, entirely to himself, just for a moment dreaming of - planning - a future for himself here. Teaching Tom seidr, exploring the universe, making love to his beautiful mortal, it would be enough to fill the decades, until…

No, best not to dwell.

“Once you have eaten, we should go.”

Ben nodded, his mouth being full of bacon and toast.

“Loki, should we perhaps try a less… intimate position for travelling?”

He thought about Tom's suggestion and the discussion they'd had the previous day regarding Midgardian relationships. “It will be less comfortable.”

“That depends on your definition of comfort, love.”

Loki snorted.

“Ben, what do you think?” Tom asked his friend.

The other human swallowed the bite he was eating. “I’m not sure what I’m being asked here.”

“You saw us… before. That’s how we usually travel. But all we really need is to be in physical contact and comfortable.”

“Nudity is not required,” Loki put in with an amused smile. “Though skin contact is.”

Color touched Ben’s cheeks and he looked down. “Maybe the sofa?”

Loki shook his head. “If you wish to awaken with a stiff...neck that is your right.”

Tom stifled a laugh and caught Loki’s eye. He’d gotten the _slight_ pause before “neck”. From the heightened color on Ben’s cheeks, he had as well.

“You should be called the god of double entendres,” Ben muttered into his tea.

“I already am,” Loki retorted. “They are part and parcel with mischief. You cannot possibly appreciate how much of a challenge it is to convey innuendo using Allspeak.”

Ben looked confused. “Allspeak?”

“Did you truly think that all the Nine Realms speak your language when even the denizens of your own planet do not?”

“I hadn’t thought about it.”

“It’s like on Doctor Who,” Tom put in. “The aliens don’t really all speak English.”

Ben frowned. “But there’s an explanation for it right? Something to do with the TARDIS?”

Tom nodded “The original explanation was a bit different. A ‘gift of the Time Lords’. It’s very hand-wavy.”

“Allspeak projects the intention behind the words into the language of the listener,” Loki explained. “It is possible to choose the specific language it projects, and allow for delicate meaning such as puns and innuendo, but it is difficult. This part of the reason Thor comes across as less intelligent than he is. Not that my brother is anything other than a fool, but he is not _stupid_. Generally”

Tom laughed. “I’m going to tell Chris you said that.”

Loki smiled. “By all means.”

Ben shook his head and took a long pull of tea. “Too weird.”

“I know what you mean,” Tom said to Ben’s surprise. “It completely threw me for a long time, how all the parts we’ve played are _real._ I’m fairly used to it now, though.”

“Is it…” Ben hesitated. “It’s not just you and Loki? It’s me too?”

“Though I can only speak from what I saw, Dr. Strange claimed to experience other worlds that we discovered, mirroring parts you have played.”  

“Huh.” Ben frowned and ate his last bite of sandwich. “Which parts?”

Loki thought back. “He was a dragon. That was noteworthy, since we otherwise had our familiar bodies as a continuity point. He also mentioned a name, but I do not recall it.”

“He was Smaug?” Ben perked up. “The dragon, that had to have been Smaug.”

Loki shrugged. “He did not say. We had other things to discuss.”

Ben scowled. “I wish I could talk to him.”

“Darling, would Dr. Strange _really_ be your first choice of a character to speak with?” Tom asked.

“I… probably not. I’ve never really thought about it.” Ben gulped down the last of his tea. “Is there anything I should know before we head out?”

“Explaining the mechanisms of astral travel would take hours,” Loki replied. “I will assure your safety.”

Ben tugged at his collar. “Okay, I guess. I’m… I’m ready then.”

Loki nodded and Tom disengaged himself from the god’s arm and went into the sitting room. He sat in the middle of the sofa and patted the seats on either side of him. Ben sat to his left and Loki to his right. Loki pulled the Tesseract out of its dimensional pocket and handed it to Tom, who slipped his fingers into the slots in the mechanism surrounding the cube.

Loki shook his head. “Only one hand.” Tom slipped his left hand out. Loki caught Ben’s eye. “Put your hand in the other side, and clasp your free hands.” The humans complied.

Now Ben and Tom were holding the Tesseract much like Loki and Tom had the first time, each with a hand in the device that surrounded the cube. Loki hooked his arm through Tom’s; he needed his hands free for the spell, since it was more complex than before. He allowed himself to savor the snap of magic where their skin touched and lay his hand along Tom’s forearm once the spell was set. The other hand he place over the Tesseract, touching the back of Ben’s hand with just his fingertips. With a muttered word, they all pulled away.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there is a small error in this chapter which I just learned of. Apparently Benedict Cumberbatch is vegan, so I apologize for putting meat in his mouth. I didn't do the fifteen seconds of research to find out if he had any dietary restrictions; obviously he's not my primary focus here. Maybe we'll just say that this version of him isn't very strict...


	20. The Hollow Crown

 

Tom was smiling even before he opened his eyes. He _knew_ that they had arrived where Loki had been aiming. Maybe it was the feel of the clothes on his skin, or the faint scent of unwashed bodies on his nose, but he _knew._ When he did open his eyes, he was greeted by a familiar sight. It was the Inn from _The Hollow Crown,_ where young Prince Hal had spent so much of his time. It was a little different - not being a sound stage and all - but clearly recognizable. His smile grew into a massive grin.

 _I take it this is the correct place?_ Loki’s amused voice came from inside his head.

 _Yes._ Tom felt giddy.

 _This is the weirdest way to talk I’ve ever experienced._ Ben’s voice sounded disgruntled and more distant than Loki’s. _And this is much closer than I ever expected to be to either of you._

Tom laughed aloud, earning him a couple of curious looks. But in this world he was a prince; no one would question him. Instead, the folks around them gave a couple of friendly smiles when he returned their looks. He sprang to his feet and relaxed into the feel of leather and linen on his skin, the weight of the sword at his hip.

“Your highness?” It was one of the inn servants.

“Just stepping out for a moment,” he replied. The servant nodded and Tom headed out the door, smiling at those they passed. Once outside, he sought out one of the more sheltered areas. _Loki, can you conjure bodies for yourself and Ben?_

 _I believe so._ Tom felt Loki pull away to concentrate. A few seconds later, a Loki clone appeared, then another. They were both clothed in something resembling Loki’s usual wrap tunic, but in black rather than green. The first swayed on his feet and clutched at his temples, while the second rippled in a wave of green magic. His clothes mirrored Tom’s but in green and black instead of black and red. This duplicate took a step towards Tom, a familiar smile on his face. Tom reached out and took Loki’s hand, entwining their fingers.

Loki turned to the first duplicate. “Focus on your own form, what you _should_ look like.”

The other shook his head, palms still on the sides of his face. “I can’t.”

“You can. It is reflexive. You know what you look like.”

Ben shook his head again; he still looked like Loki.

“Try and thinking of Richard,” Tom suggested. “That might be easier. Assume the character.”

Ben nodded and let his hands drop. He flexed his shoulders, rolling them back, dropped his head forward. His own face overwrote Loki’s and the left shoulder going up slightly while the right dropped. He looked up at the other two. “Did it work?”

Tom and Loki nodded simultaneously and identically. Loki reached out with his free hand and tweaked at Ben’s tunic. It changed under his fingers to a more appropriate style, still black, but fuller and more symmetrical. He conjured a sword on Ben’s hip and his own. “There. We shall blend in now.”

“Well, we’re here, what now?” Ben asked, looking around. “Where are we?”

“London,” Tom replied. He put both hands on his hips, looking at the surrounding buildings.

Ben wrinkled his nose. “It doesn’t smell the best.”

Tom laughed. “I guess I’m used to it.” He tapped his nose. “Or at least this body is. I’m not surprised, though. Sanitation isn’t really a thing right now.”

“Let’s not get cholera, okay?”

“Or dysentery,” Tom replied.

Ben looked him over. “You look too young for dysentery.”

Tom laughed.

Loki looked between the two with a raised eyebrow. “I can purify anything we eat or drink, and your form cannot be infected with a mortal disease,” he told Ben. “And how is someone too young for a bacterial disease?”

“He’s joking, Loki,” Tom explained. “My host dies of dysentery in his mid thirties.”

“Ah.” Loki nodded, but pain lurked in his eyes. “Mortals are so fragile.”

Tom thought he understood. “It’s much better in our time. Not that it never happens, unfortunately. Far too many people _do_ still die from drinking contaminated water, but it’s almost unheard of in the first world.”

Loki nodded again, but didn’t appreciatively relax. “In any case, we shall not be here long enough for you to become ill.”

Tom put a comforting hand on the god’s shoulder. “I’m fine, love.” He leaned in to kiss Loki, but Ben cleared his throat.

“Probably best not to do that here,” he said when Tom and Loki looked at him with identical frowns. “Pretty sure sodomy is a punishable offense in this time.”

“I was not planning on…” Loki began.

Tom interrupted. “Ah. Yes.” He squeezed Loki’s shoulder. “It’s not just the act, it’s the whole relationship. Sorry love.”

Loki scowled. “Barbarians.”

“Religion,” Ben countered. “Kind of the opposite in some ways.”

The god shook his head. “Outlawing love is ridiculous.”

“It does actually come from outlawing the act.” Tom looked at Loki seriously. “I’d think you’d understand that, at least in part.”

Loki frowned. “It… it is not the same.”

“It isn’t exactly, no, but similar.”

Ben looked between the two trying to decide if he wanted to ask what they were talking about. He didn’t. “In any case, no kissing, love birds.”

Tom laughed and wrapped his arms around both men’s shoulders. “Alright, alright. Ready to see what the 15th century has to offer?”

“Lead on, my prince.” Ben waved a hand gallantly.

“Loki?”

The god grinned. “My prince, indeed. This is your realm.” Loki copied Ben’s gesture, though it was more fluid and natural looking when he did it. “After you.”

Tom smiled. It was so easy to feel this place, that the words were out of his mouth before he realized he was speaking.

“Then let us now walk light upon on our path, as flowers that bloom gently in the spring. And aft we hath once taken our repast, into this world’s delights we set awing.”

Ben sighed. “You’re going to be insufferable, aren’t you?”

“Oh probably.” Tom grinned. “Can you blame me?”

Ben shook his head and Loki laughed.

Tom started walking, dragging the others along with him. “Come then, my friends!”

 

o0o

 

Loki watched Ben and Tom curiously as they wandered around this new realm. They visited an apothecary shop first. This was nothing unusual to Loki; it was more primitive than such a shop would have been on Asgard or Alfheim, but familiar. The interactions between his mortal and the other actor were far more intriguing.

Although Loki had a few theories on the nature of their relationship, there was nothing like observation to make things clear. He knew that Tom was attracted to his friend - Loki and Tom had very similar tastes in partners - and this was born out by the way his eyes flowed over Ben. The overly careful physical interactions spoke of Tom’s uncertainty of how that attraction would be received. Ben for his part watched Tom like he was the most important thing in the world, but only when Tom wasn’t looking.

Loki was even more certain that he’d been right; they had been lovers - or perhaps almost lovers - and had moved away from it, deciding to be friends instead. But neither man was entirely happy about it. The god suspected that Ben’s marriage had something to do with the situation. Humans were stupid about sex, and if exclusivity was the assumed norm, well, heartbreak was the inevitable result. That didn’t even include what Tom had said about relationships between members of the same gender; it was all too logical to choose a woman as one’s partner and remain friends with your male lover.

Loki couldn’t help feel a bit of guilt over how happy it made him that Ben had made that error. If Tom had been in a relationship, he would not have been open to Loki’s advances. But that meant that his mortal had suffered, thus the guilt.

He let his eyes follow that very mortal, simply observing Tom in this new role. The actor had taken on the bearing of a prince when the three entered this realm, and it was beautiful. He looked younger, his hair curled into a red-gold halo around his head, and there was more lightness to  his step. A smile adorned his face - or a hint of a smile lurked - all of the time. Loki wasn’t certain if it was “Hal’s” nature or if Tom was so very much enjoying himself. He wanted to ravish the mortal even more than usual and the restrictions of this backwards, primitive time made him want to bite. He’d gotten used to being able to show his affections freely. _Spoiled._

“Loki?”

The god pulled himself from his revery and turned his attention to his mortal’s words, rather than just his body. “Yes?”

“Are you alright? Is this too draining for you?” Tom laid a hand on Loki’s shoulder.

Loki smiled and leaned into the contact. “No. I am perhaps a bit distracted, but I can maintain both bodies for a while yet.”

Tom smiled at him. “Good. Don’t let yourself get too tired on my account.”

It was… warming to have his mortal express such concerns. Loki could tell that Tom was enjoying himself immensely in this primitive realm, and that he would take time from his enjoyment to make sure that Loki was alright rather than take his magic for granted was heartening. He expected nothing less from his mortal, but it was good to not take him for granted either.  “I will let you know when I need to stop.”

Tom’s grip tightened on his shoulder. “Please do.” He leaned into Loki in a way that made it clear that he would have kissed the god if he’d been free to do so.

Loki pressed his hand against Tom’s back and swept his thumb along the mortal’s spine. It was hardly the first time he’d had to couch romantic gestures in those of “brotherly” affection. Hiding in plain sight was easy for him, even though he disliked the lack of the freedom that he’d become used to in Tom’s realm. He sensed that it chafed at Tom as well.

They left the apothecary shop and wandered the street until they found a blacksmith. Again, this was a primitive version of what Loki would have seen at home, but it seemed to fascinate the actors. After waving the smith back to his work with a smile, Tom moved the group around so that they were out of the way but could see the forge clearly.

“It’s not quite what you’d see in a reenactment, is it?” Ben muttered to Tom.

Tom nodded. “I see what you mean. Is this what blacksmiths were like on Asgard?”

Loki cocked his head to the side, observing the smith at his work. “Not exactly, but close. This is much as a lesser smith would work. One who worked on common iron rather than a weapon-smith. Those weapons that were not imported from the Dwarves were made by skilled artisans who wove charms into the blades as they worked. I always found the spellwork most interesting.” He smiled. “When we were children, Thor and I would visit the palace smiths. He liked the hammering and fire, though would get bored of it easily. I could watch them sew seidr into weapons for hours.”

Ben looked at Loki curiously. “Could he see that? The magic?”

The god frowned. “I think he could, but it took more effort than he preferred. My brother’s magic is less... subtle than my own, and he had no patience for control. I worry for him now that Mjolnir is gone. He could easily do great damage to himself or others without it.”

Ben gave Loki an odd look that the god couldn’t quite interpret. He raised a questioning eyebrow at the mortal.

“I guess I didn’t expect you to talk about Thor so… affectionately.”

Loki frowned. “My relationship with my brother is quite complicated. Perhaps you are right though; distance is making things easier.”

Tom wrapped an arm around Loki’s shoulders and squeezed. “I’m glad.”

Ben gave Tom an incredulous look and Tom glared back. Loki laughed at the interchange. He loved seeing Tom’s fierce protectiveness and acceptance of himself, and was amused by Ben’s reactions.   

Tom’s glare deepened. “Did you expect me to be judgemental about this?”

“Jealous, maybe?” Ben spread his hands wide and shrugged. “Not my place.”

“No, it isn’t,” Tom snapped.

Ben opened his mouth, then snapped it shut.

“Jealousy doesn’t enter into it, Ben. It’s not like that.”

Loki raised an eyebrow at Tom’s remark. Perhaps his talk about how relationships worked on Asgard had gotten through somewhat? Or perhaps Tom was just secure in his place in Loki’s affections. Not that Thor would have wanted Loki back, in any case.

“No, you’re not really the possessive type, are you?” Ben muttered quietly, his words lost to mortal ears below the sound of the bellows. Loki wondered at his odd tone, but said nothing.

“What was that?” Tom asked.

“Nothing.”

Loki looked back and forth between the humans. “We should go outside.”

Tom nodded, said farewell to the smith, and lead them back out into the weak sunshine.

“How are you feeling?” Loki asked Ben.

“What do you mean?”

“Are you tired at all? This form of travel can be exhausting if one is not used to it.”

Ben frowned, then nodded. “I am getting more tired than I would have thought.”

“We should leave soon, then.”

 

Tom looked at the god. “What about you, Loki?”

“I can maintain us a while longer, but I, too, am reaching a point where it might become dangerous if we need to leave suddenly or if I have to do any additional magic.”

Tom nodded and started walking back towards the Inn. Loki and Ben followed, trailing slightly behind.

As they approached the Inn, Ben stumbled against Loki. The god caught him easily, but Ben did not recover his feet and leaned heavily against Loki’s shoulder. “Tom.”

Tom turned at Loki’s call, and came back to where the two were standing. “Ben, you alright?”

Ben shook his head to clear it. “Tired.”

“We must go now.” Loki tilted Ben’s head up and looked at his clouded blue-gray eyes. “He’s fading.”

“Do what you have to,” Tom said quietly, looking at his friend with worried eyes.

Loki absorbed the clone back into the body he currently inhabited, pulling Ben’s astral form with it. The mortal felt heavy in his mind, nearly asleep. The god looked around quickly to see if they were alone, then kissed Tom, pouring their astral forms into the host body even as the last clone dissipated.

_Go back quickly, beloved._

Tom scampered back into the Inn and slumped Hal’s customary seat. Loki pulled them all away, back to Tom’s home.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Argh, this chapter took forever to write! 
> 
> My beta is responsible for the lovely, flowery scrap of Shakespearean dialogue Tom ad libs, my brain doesn't work that way. Or at least I'd have to watch a whole lot more Shakespeare to get it there.


	21. Chapter 21

 

Tom opened his eyes to his own sitting room. He was sandwiched, slightly squished, between Ben and Loki on his sofa. Loki was cuddled against his right side, head on Tom’s shoulder, pressed tight against him in a constant hum of magic. Ben was slumped against his other side, his head rested on Tom’s upper arm, their thighs pressed together.

The heat of their bodies felt heavy on Tom’s skin, weighty and solid. A moment of pure desire flashed through his body as his mind - completely unbidden - formed fantasies of being between these two people in a totally different way.

He had missed this closeness with Ben so very much. It had nothing to do with his feelings for Loki. That realization hit him like a lightning bolt. The loves were independent of one another and did not conflict, though that was hard to countenance. But this feeling… this feeling of the two men pressed against him, it was intoxicating and primal. Greater than the sum of its parts. He’d never felt anything like it.

Loki stirred against his side, while Ben remained motionless, save for his breathing. Tom looked at the god as he pulled away from his slumped position against Tom’s side. Their eyes met, and Loki smiled. It was full of mischief and lust; a look that Tom was very familiar with by now. His heart sped faster as the god leaned in to kiss him, threaded his fingers through Tom’s curls.  

Loki spoke quietly against his lips. “I feel as though I've had to wait an eternity to do that.”

Tom reignited the kiss. He felt Ben’s fingers entwined with his, Loki’s skin against his own, warm magic flowing through them, a circuit from lips to arm. It was too much. He made a low sound between a moan and a gasp as Ben’s fingers tightened in his hand.

Loki pulled away, still smiling, and looked over his shoulder at Ben’s stirring form. “We do have company, beloved, as I’m sure you’re aware.”

Tom looked over to look at Ben as he sat up. The other actor pulled his hands away from the Tesseract and from Tom, and brought them up to rub his face. Tom took a moment to remove his hand from the contraption surrounding the Tesseract as well, and Loki twisted the cube away to whatever extradimensional space that he kept it.

Tom wanted to pull Loki back into their kiss, push Ben back onto the sofa and his kiss _him._ He wanted to draw them all into his selfish fantasies, but he did nothing. Loki - he was certain - would embrace the situation with open arms, but Ben would not. It wasn’t fair.

Ben pulled his hands away from his eyes, down to his mouth and looked at the others. His wide eyes flitted back and forth between their faces. His fingers pressed against  his lips, his pupils large in the semi-darkness. He swallowed visibly. Tom felt Loki’s breath hitch in what might be a small laugh or a sound of desire.

“I don’t think I’m going to ever get used to that,” Ben said quietly.

Tom raised an eyebrow, and from Ben’s expression, he was pretty sure Loki had done the same. “Used to what?” Tom asked, though he was certain he knew.

“The two of you.”

Tom drew his brows down. “You should probably try.”

“Indeed.” Loki slipped an arm around Tom’s waist. The message was clear. _“I’m not going anywhere.”_ Tom leaned back into the god’s embrace because he wanted to lean forward and kiss Ben and pull Loki with him

“How are you feeling?” Tom asked, because that was safe.

Ben’s eyes continued to flick back and forth between them. “Alright. Tired, but not dangerously so. I’ll be fit to drive, if I have to.”

“But are you okay to walk? If you want to go home, that is.” Why had he allowed that sentence out of his mouth?

Ben gulped again, and nodded. “I’ll be fine shortly.”

Loki chuckled and kissed Tom’s neck. The god saw everything, knew Tom’s feelings, Ben’s thoughts, and found it all _so_ amusing. For a split second, Tom resented Loki’s omniscient eye, genius mind, and utter _freedom._

No. That wouldn’t do.

He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. He had to center himself, had to escape these spiralling thoughts and feelings. It was _dangerous_ to go down these paths; life just didn’t work that way, _“I do what I want”_ notwithstanding. Tom felt Loki’s magic seeping into him, felt it circulate with his breath, felt more awake and aware, clear headed.

“Did you do that on purpose?” Loki asked.

Tom frowned, his eyes still closed. “Sort of?”

“What are you talking about?” Ben asked.

“Magic.” Tom could tell Loki was grinning from the sound of his voice.

Ben rolled his eyes. “If you’re going to be deliberately obfuscating, I’m leaving.”

“I don’t believe your friend is ready for this, beloved.”

Tom pressed his back against Loki’s chest. “You’re probably right.”

“I’m right here, you know.”

Loki chuckled. “Tom is learning to use seidr. Magic.”

Ben’s eyes widened. “You’re fucking with me.”

Tom said, “he’s not,” as Loki whispered in his ear, “not yet”.

Tom suppressed a shiver. Loki pushed a wave of magic through him, making the shiver impossible to keep hidden. “Loki, we have a guest. Remember?”

The god sighed dramatically. “As you wish.”

Ben gave them another look. “I don’t want to know.”

Again, Loki whispered in Tom’s ear. “Liar.” Tom elbowed him lightly in the stomach and hissed, and the god’s silver tongue went still.

Ben frowned at them and got to his feet. “I think you two might need some alone time.”

Loki opened his mouth and received a slightly sharper elbow. Tom knew that there was no way he could hurt Loki, and silent responses seemed a better move. Loki chuckled and pulled Tom closer so that he was practically in the god’s lap.

“If you’re alright?” Tom asked, because he had to. He recognized Loki’s mood. The god wanted to push things, and he would keep pushing until something happened. That was dangerous. If Ben stayed, Loki would keep at both of them until something broke.

Ben nodded and headed for the door. “Thank you, by the way. That was an amazing experience.”

“I’m glad you decided to…” Tom paused. Every way he could think of to end that sentence was a double entendre.

“You are quite welcome,” Loki said, covering over Tom’s lapse.

“I’ll see you later.” Ben walked out.

Before the door had closed completely, Loki bit Tom’s neck.

Tom moaned as magic pulsed through him. “You utter bastard.” He twisted reluctantly away from Loki’s mouth to face the god. “What happened to not fucking with my friend?”

Loki sniggered, and buried his hand back in Tom’s hair. “He wants us, beloved, so very much. How could I resist?”

“We talked about this.”

“You have changed your opinions on the subject since we last spoke of it.”

Tom opened his mouth to challenge Loki’s words, but he realized that the god was right. “We should still talk about things like that first.”

“As you will, beloved. Later.” Loki leaned in and kissed him. “Enough of your friend. He is gone, we are here, and I have barely been able to touch you all day.”

Tom ran his fingers up into Loki’s hair and pulled him close. “The 21st century does have its advantages. Indoor plumbing, gay rights, refrigeration, a large comfortable bed.”

“Excellent ideas, all of them. I suggest we find the last.”

“Do we really need to move? It’s not like we haven’t Christened the sofa already.”

“We need more space for what I have in mind.”

“Well then, whatever you say.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is definitely an "E" rated alternative to this scene where Tom is less of a good person...


	22. Chapter 22

Loki reflected that one of the nicer side effects of sleeping with Tom was a lack of nightmares. Since Loki had been sleeping in the mortal’s bed, he had been surprised how undisturbed and pleasant his rest was. He wasn’t about to question his luck.

Eventually, his luck ran out.

_It was only a dream. Only a nightmare. Only only only…_

Thor was dead, his body encased in ice, floating in the Void, his brother’s single eye, once beautiful and blue was now blank and lifeless. Yet he reached out for Loki, frozen hands pleading for his beloved brother to save him. Or begging with Loki to not destroy him with the ice in his monstrous soul.

 _You can’t hide forever. I will destroy everything you love, slowly, painfully. I will find you.You are_ **_mine_ ** _._

Thor’s form shattered. Shards of frozen blood, red and sharp like rubies, clouded the Void.

Loki felt his entire existence fracture, cracking into splinters where his brother had broken.

A scream ripped from Loki’s throat as he woke, Thor’s dismemberment burned onto his eyes.  

“Loki?”

The god rolled away from his lover’s warm hold and out of bed. He couldn’t stop shaking.

“Love, what’s wrong?”

“I…” the god paused. He couldn’t put his thoughts into words. That would make them real.

 _They were real_.

And they weren’t real. It was only a dream “A nightmare,” he said out loud. “Nothing more.”

Tom sat up, blankets coiled around him. “Were you falling?”

Loki shook his head. He wrapped his arms around his torso, and paced the length of the bedroom. He had to tell Tom. He trusted the mortal at his side. His mortal would make everything alright. “No, I was not falling. Thor… he was... frozen. Shattered.”

Tom stilled. “How?”

Loki shook his head. “I do not know. I... I may have killed him, but he… he was in the Void.”

“Come back to bed.”

The god looked sharply at his mortal. “You know something of this?”

Tom reached out to him. “Please.”

Reluctantly, Loki returned to the bed and allowed Tom to wrap himself around his shivering form. “Tell me that Thor doesn’t die. Tell me that I don’t kill him.”

Tom kissed his hair. “I can’t tell you what happens, love, you know that. Besides, you’re here.”

Loki shook his head and tried to burrow into Tom’s shoulder.

“There’s more, isn’t there.” It wasn’t a question.

He nodded, and clung to Tom more tightly. “Tha… the Titan, he spoke to me.”

Tom stroked his back soothingly. “Do you think it was really him, or just a dream?”

“I don’t know, but I fear it may have been real.”

“Oh Loki, I’m so sorry.” Tom kissed his hair and held him tightly. “What are you going to do?”

“Never sleep again.”

“That’s not an option and you know it.”

“He will break me.”

“Darling, you’re safe here.”

“No, I am not. If he can reach me… He will kill you.” Loki clung to his mortal. “I cannot… I will not allow harm to come to you. I cannot.”

Tom had stilled against Loki’s side, though he kept his arms wrapped around the shaking god. “Do you think he could?”

“With the power of the rest of the Stones? Undoubtedly. Perhaps even without them.”

“We can run.”

Loki looked up at Tom with wide eyes. “What?”

“I mean, take the Tesseract away with us. Use it to go into another dimension and just stay there.”

“You would leave your life behind?” Loki balked.

“Of course.”

It was so simple, that response. He didn’t mean it. Couldn't. Not for him. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do. I love you.” Tom squeezed Loki’s shoulders. “You’d be leaving yours too, you know.”

Loki scoffed. He’d already left the remaining dregs of Asgard. Left Thor.

Who might be dead. Or about to be killed. Mutilated and killed. The image of his brother’s shattered remains were still engraved onto his mind.

“I…” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Such a thing should not be entered into lightly.”

“You’re right. Of course. Just...think about it, okay?”

 _Think about it._ Tom didn’t need to, he was already so sure? “Go back to sleep, beloved. I need to consider this.”

Loki sent a tiny pulse of seidr into to Tom to ensure that his lover fell easily back into slumber. The god needed to separate himself from the mortal’s comforting presence. Needed to examine the situation clearly, this terrible weight laid upon him.

Thanos knew how Loki felt about Thor. The mad warlord had ripped the knowledge of their relationship from Loki’s memories long ago. He would not hesitate to tear Asgard’s king to shreds just for a chance to claim the Tesseract. And the Titan would certainly pursue Loki across dimensions, and revel at the mountain of the dead he left in his wake.

Tom would have no hope. Whatever advantage his fledgling seidr gave him was negated by his fragile mortal body. Loki would go mad if Tom were killed. His precious, frail human. Even if Loki could disguise his affections, anyone who laid eyes on the mortal would see their connection effortlessly. Loki’s heart broke even contemplating what agonies would befall the actor were Thanos to get at him. Perhaps they _could_ flee, but Loki knew it would only be temporary. Thanos would destroy the Nine Realms and then hunt them relentlessly, annihilating all in in his path.

And Thor would die. They would all die. Thor’s irritating mortal friends, the Valkyrie, the Sakaaran refugies. All that was left of Asgard.

Was Loki that much of a coward?

He sighed. He’d willing given Tom his reins, let the mortal control him, because he knew that Tom was a good man where Loki himself was not. He doubted that Tom even realized what Loki had done. The human loved him in a way no one else did, or ever had. If nothing else, Loki could protect _him_.

The god found pen and paper in Tom’s study and wrote a brief note. He didn’t notice that he was crying until the ink blurred under his tears. He retreated to the guest room he’d only slept in once and retrieved his armor, left untouched all this time. He donned the blue leather with a heavy heart.

He snuck back upstairs and sent another pulse of seidr into the bedroom to assure his mortal would remain asleep.

Tom was sprawled across the bed, reaching into the space where Loki usually slept, clutching at nothing in his lover’s absence. Loki choked back a sob. He shouldn’t have returned  to say goodbye. But he had to. With tears running down his cheeks, Loki ripped apart connection between his and Tom’s minds. If Loki fell into Thanos’s hands, the Titan might be able to trace it back to the mortal. It was _agony_ , but it had to be done.

He kissed Tom’s cheek, afraid that if he did anything more, he’d never be able to leave. The note went under Tom’s spectacles where he’d be sure to find it, and Loki left the bedroom. For the last time.

Downstairs again, Loki pulled the Tesseract from its place in his pocket dimension. It bathed the room in azure and cast strange shadows on the walls. The working to travel back to the Nine Realms was complex, taxing, but well within his power. There was the temptation to just run on his own, to flee to one of Tom’s universes and just _live._ But all alone? Constantly on the move? That would protect no one. He might, just might, be able to affect the outcome of the coming war with his scraps of future knowledge. More importantly, Thanos might find Tom anyway, tracing the Tesseract to this Midgard by using the other Stones or his own vast powers. This realm was so vulnerable. So easily broken.

With a deep shaking breath, Loki began the ritual to pull the Tesseract back to the Nine Realms. Back to a home that was not his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *ducks*


	23. Chapter 23

 

Tom woke alone. It had happened before; Loki would occasionally arise before him and decide against waking him for whatever reason. But this was different, the house felt empty. No, it was more than that. His _mind_ felt empty and aching. The buzz of magic on his skin that had become so familiar, so comfortable, was gone. Panic seized him. Tom scrabbled for his glasses, and in his blindness, his fingers brushed a sheet of paper.

His heart dropped to his stomach as he saw his name in an elegant scrawl on the outside fold. He unfolded the paper with shaking hands.

 

_Beloved,_

_I cannot protect you from the Mad Titan on my own, nor can I risk your death._

_I could never forgive myself if you fell into his hands._ _Truly I think it would send_ _me irrecoverably mad. So I must return to my realm. I shall do my best to keep_ _him away from you._ _Whatever it takes._

 

_Never doubt that I love you._

_Loki_

 

The paper fell from lifeless fingers. _No. No no no nononono…_  

Loki was gone. Everything he’d done was for nothing. The god had returned to the fate that the films had set out for him. Tom had tried so hard, but… Loki had gone back to face the Titan, make terrible choices, risk everything. For him. For Thor. He’d known that the vision of his brother’s death had shaken the god, but he’d believed Loki when he’d said he just wanted to think.

Tom was an idiot. Of _course_ Loki would sacrifice himself to save his loved ones; he wasn’t a coward, despite what Asgard said of him. He’d done it before. He would do it again.

Of course Loki knew more because of his stay here, with Tom. He knew that Thanos was coming, and soon. It might help. Might change things.

But none of that eased the sharp agony that stabbed into Tom’s chest. Loki was gone and his heart was breaking.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat, weeping in the emptiness of his bedroom. He couldn’t do this.

Tom picked up his mobile from its customary spot on the bedside table and sent a quick text to Ben.

_Pls come. Need you._

Indeterminable seconds ticked by.

_On my way._

The endless minutes crawled, though he felt nothing. Suspended in grief, heartbreak. He heard the door shut below and Ben’s voice calling.

“Tom?”

“Upstairs.” His voice sounded broken to his own ears

Ben stumbled into the bedroom, taken aback by Tom’s red eyes and undressed state. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Wordlessly Tom handed over the sheet of paper that lay on his lap.

“He left?”

Tom nodded. He scrubbed his face with the back of his hand, trying to stem the flow of tears that hadn’t stopped since he read the letter. It felt like they would never stop.

Ben sat on the edge of the bed, reading the note another time. “I’m so sorry.”

“I should have known it would happen.” Tom’s voice was lifeless, flat. “I should have known he wouldn’t stay for long. I _did_ know. I tried so hard…” He choked on the tears stuck in his throat and crumpled forward. “I’m never going to see him again.”

The other actor looked on, horrified as his friend… his best friend, shattered in front him. “Oh god, Tom, I’m so sorry.” Ben hesitated for a moment, then wrapped his arm around Tom’s bare shoulders. “I’m sorry.” Tom shook under his hand, body wracked with sobs.

“What’s wrong with me, Ben? Why does everyone leave me? Why couldn't I keep him here? Am I not good enough? I try so hard to _be good_ , but it… It’s never _enough_ ,” the last word ripped from his throat like a scream. “What’s wrong with me.” Flat. Broken.

“Nothing, you’re perfect.” The words tumbled out of Ben’s mouth before he could stop them. “You’re too perfect, like you’re not real. But you’re the most real person I’ve ever met.”

Tom collapsed onto his side, away from Ben, slipping from his grasp. “Why?”

“Why what?” Ben thought he knew, but he didn’t want to answer.

“You know what.”

“I…”

“Tell me!” Tom wailed.

“Fear.” Ben swallowed hard. “I was afraid. I was.... I wanted more than what we had, and it terrified me. I couldn’t… I _couldn’t_ be in love with you.”

Tom laughed, gutted and mad. Laughed until he couldn’t breathe.

Ben put a hand on Tom’s shaking back. “Please talk to me.”

“You told me that you didn’t want… that… that…”

“I’m sorry.”

“And… and now he’s gone too. Loki loved me and I betrayed him and he’s _gone_.” The words were bleeding out of Tom, clawing their way through him, shredding his insides.

“You never betrayed him.”

“Didn’t I? I should have told him from the beginning. I should have kept him from… from getting _attached_. I should have sent him along, somewhere safe.”

“It was his choice.” Ben winced at his own words.

“I should have been better.”

“He loves you.”

“So he left. Just like everyone else.”

“He’s protecting you. Keeping you safe.”

Tom rolled onto his back and glared at Ben with furious red-rimmed eyes. “Is _that_ what you’ve been doing? Protecting me? I don’t want to be _safe_ , I want him back _._ I finally had something that felt right.” He dissolved once again into tears.

Ben watched Tom sob. He didn’t say _“you were together for less than a fortnight,_ ” or _“how would you have explained this to everyone?”_ Or any of the dozens of incredulous questions that he’d been saving up since he learned that Tom was in a relationship with the actual Loki. The questions he’d been saving since he’d learned that not only was Tom fucking the god - or being fucked by him, more likely - but that he was in love.

“I’m sorry.” He put a hand on Tom’s bare shoulder.

“You’re not.”

That stung. “I am. I meant what I said. I just want you to be happy. Safe.”

Tom glared. “You have a peculiar way of showing it.”

“You think that this is easy for me?” Ben allowed his anger to show on his face, dark brows drawn down. “Do you think it’s been easy for me to watch you flit from woman to woman all these years? Sure that you’d end up heartbroken every time? Knowing that…” He looked away. “Knowing you _might_ have been happier with me?”

“Darling, please, it’s not like that.”

“Isn’t it?”

“No. I’ve just never found anything that felt _right_. Until…”

“Until you fell in love with yourself.”

Tom’s laugh was more like a scoff. “I wouldn’t put it like that.”

“Obviously not.”

“My narcissistic tendencies got the better of me, I suppose.”

“Tom, you’re one of the most selfless people I know. You’re not a narcissist.”

“I meant in the classical sense.”

Ben made a noise of understanding. “Caught by your own reflection until you drown.”

“Yes.” Tom broke into another sob. “I feel like I’m drowning.”

“I am sorry. I wish I could help.”

There was a long pause. 

“Just… hold me?”

Ben’s mouth went dry. Could he? Could he possibly not? “Alright.” He slipped off his coat and lay down next to his friend. “Come here.”

Tom unhesitatingly rolled into his arms and clung to Ben’s torso. Ben tried to breathe past how uncomfortable he was. Tom’s skin was hot and smooth under his hands and he was all-too aware of the blankets riding down around his hips. Lucky for him the way that Tom was sobbing on to his chest was distinctly unsexy.

Eventually, Tom fell asleep, worn out from weeping. Ben slipped away to make tea. And think. He had a lot of thinking to do.

 

o0o

 

Ben stared into his tea cup, watching the milk and tea swirl together. He hesitated to call Chris again. Ben felt like he should be able to help Tom on his own, but he’d never seen his friend so devastated after a breakup. Not that this was a normal breakup. Instead of some singer or starlet, Tom had been sleeping with a god who was now out of his life forever. Except… not. Tom would never be free of Loki. He _was_ Loki.

He’d picked up the pieces of Tom’s heart before. Could he do it again?

If nothing else, Chris deserved to know that Loki had left.

 _Loki’s gone. He went back home._ He sent the text, hoping that it didn’t sound too heartless.

The response came quickly. _Fuck. Is Tom okay?_

 _No._   _He’s utterly gutted. I’m not sure what to do._

_Why did he go?_

_To protect Tom. He was worried about Thanos coming here._

Long moments passed before Chris replied. _That’s a pretty good reason._

_Yeah, but how do I pick up the pieces?_

_You can’t. Just be there for him._

_I don’t think that’ll be enough._

Another long pause.

_You’ll just have to make some choices, then._

Ben choked.

_I guess I will._

 


	24. Epilogue

 

Loki was back in his bed on the ship, alone. The Tesseract sat on his stomach, singing to him in its sad voice of energy and magic. For a moment, he just let the tears stream down the sides of his face and soak into his hair. His hands tightened on the Tesseract construction, bending the wires. The cube was invulnerable, but the device he’d built around it shredded under his fingers. Destroying it was too easy to be satisfying, but at least now he couldn’t give in to the temptation of going back.

He held the naked cube up in his splayed fingers so he could see it. “I hate you.”

The Tesseract sang back quietly in his mind.

With a deep, tear-wracked sigh, Loki vanished the cube, tucking it away until he needed it. He would need it. Of that he had no doubt.

He clothed himself in an illusion of good humor. He knew that Thor would ask where he’d been, but if his brother saw that he was distraught, the questions would be unbearable. A quick check in the mirror showed him an unconcerned face. _Lies._ Thor would not think to look through the illusion. He had no reason to doubt Loki’s current mental state.

He found Thor in one of the observation rooms, looking out one of the ship’s viewing windows into space.

“Brother, where have you been? Travelling again?”

Loki smiled, bright and false. “Yes indeed. I just got back.”

“I’m glad you have returned.” Thor placed a hand on his shoulder. Loki resisted the urge to bite him. Instead he just shrugged off the hand. Thor looked hurt for a moment and crossed his arms over his chest.

Loki locked his hands together in front of him to keep from strangling his brother. He just wanted to go home. “How are we progressing?”

“Well. Our course has not changed.”

Maybe he could dissuade Thor from their current destination. Some distance from where the Tesseract had been for centuries might help. “Do you really think it’s a good idea to go back to Earth?”

Thor’s response was predictably flippant. “Yes of course, the people of Earth love me. I’m very popular.”

 _Idiot._ “Let me rephrase that. Do you really think it’s a good idea to bring _me_ back to Earth?” Maybe Thor might see some sense?

“Probably not, to be honest.” Loki smiled ruefully, almost laughed, though laughter felt beyond him now. At least Thor realized it was a terrible plan. “But worry not, brother. I feel like everything is going to work out fine.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's it. I'm a slave to cannon.
> 
> Thank you everyone who's stuck this out with me! Please let me know what you think.
> 
> ***  
> Well, I just saw Infinity War, and I'm actually pretty impressed with how well this story holds up. 
> 
> Also, fuck cannon.


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